May
31

Stop Dwelling and Move On! (Let Go)

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Something I have noticed throughout my whole life is that most people tend to hold on to stuff, and I have pretty much always been a person that changes a lot (I allow myself to out-grow things and people).

I remember when I was younger too when people would ask things like “are you a shy person or are you outgoing?”, “are you like this, or like that?” etc, and I would answer that I’m both and the reply I got back was “you can’t be both!”, and in my mind that was just weird.

Of course I can be both! (And more)

It depends in what context and situation I’m in. Sometimes I’m shy and sometimes I’m anything but.

I can be nice and sweet and kind but I can also be someone who’s not afraid of speaking up or sharing my feelings and thoughts openly, and thus I don’t shy away from confrontations if needed.

We are all everything, a little bit of everything – there’s a light and sunny side to all of us, but we all have a “darker side” too, but that’s not ‘wrong’ in any way – it’s all a part of being human!

Knowing that I can be the observer of my emotions and that they change continuously (for everyone, not just me) makes it very easy for me not to take them so damn serious all the time.

I don’t hold on to beliefs or opinions but instead I allow myself to change my mind.

Opinions are just opinions, they are not true.

I move on very easily.

This is not to be mistaken that I’m without strong core values and standards; those I’m very clear about and I don’t compromise them and they don’t change very often.

That makes it easy for me to move on because I know what’s OK with me and what’s notI’m true to myself.

If I come to the realization that a relationship is not working for example, I move on.

I’m a bit like a guy if you will (you know what I mean) when it comes to that – I’m not sentimental at all, and I can easily cut people off from my life without being too emotional about it.

Some people are still stuck in something that happened weeks ago (even years) , and they are still thinking and dwelling on stuff.

I just don’t dwell, simple as that. (And I don’t play the victim-hood-game).

Holding on to stuff, people, situations, emotions, thoughts and what not is the sure ticket to misery.

Dwelling on what was or could have been is completely foreign to me, I don’t do those things.

I invite you to have a look at your own stuff; do you dwell on things that are over and out already?

What are you keeping alive in your mind that you know would do you good to just let go of?

Below is a bunch of my old posts about letting go and releasing the old:

Enjoy your read! 🙂

Every “problem” happens in the mind, in the movement of thought:

mariaerving.com/stay-in-the-now 

Forgiveness and Acceptance PDF: Click Here for direct link 

mariaerving.com/spiritually-anew (Let go of rigid beliefs)

mariaerving.com/forgiveness-sets-us-free (Let go of grudges)

mariaerving.com/the-symbolic-backpack-exercise (The symbolic back-pack exercise)

Protect Yourself: Get Away From Draining People:

mariaerving.com/remove-yourself-from-negative-energy 

Reflect, Embrace Wisdom, Let Go of Pain, and Move On:

mariaerving.com/reflect-and-let-go 

And lastly, a post that came to mind was this one about Full Moon Feng Shui:

mariaerving.com/full-moon-feng-shui

Spiritual Teacher Maria Erving

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Comments

  1. Edward says:

    I totally agree with you! We have to learn letting go of things that make us feel bad. Only when we do so that we can make a progress in our life.

  2. Maria Erving says:

    For me it’s not about letting things go just because they ‘feel bad’, that to me is a bit immature.

    To explain what I mean: (And maybe you meant this too).

    What is important to me is to have a close look at the so called ‘bad feelings’ and find the wisdom in them, not to avoid them or get rid of them just because they ‘feel bad’.

    Feelings in themselves are not bad, they are indications on what’s going on on a deeper level and should in my mind be investigated and dealt with.

    I can easily let go of stuff, people and situations because I have developed a strong foundation to stand on when it comes to my values and standards and that has nothing to do with turning my back on stuff/things/situations/people just because they feel bad, or I’m uncomfortable with them somehow.

    That would be avoiding life and the message in the experience and not constructive at all.

    Progress is not made by avoiding feelings, but to deal with them right away and learn from them and then move on with a clearer understanding of life.

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My intent is to have people think independently, feel deeply and honestly, and move into a higher knowing of themselves.