How Do You Keep The Insights Alive? (Ask Maria)

How Do You Keep The Insights Alive?

A question that has come to mind lately and it was triggered by one of your articles: (This one)

“How can one improve on to not loose the underlying sense of ‘aha’ when one has such a moment but after that falls back to the old way of doing things?

How to keep the insight alive?

I seem to have quite a bit of those small aha moments but then fall back quite easily.

It just dissipates quickly to some high degree although it always leaves traces.

But those traces are sometimes minor until I get another moment in which I get the same aha again albeit on a slightly deeper level.

So it goes deeper and deeper, and clearly it is resolving something in me, but it seems to take several (sometimes many) such moments before I can make it stick.

Although other moments “change” me fully in one go, like when I was driving home one day and I just saw the irrelevancy of genders… ‘Genders’ are inspired by our biological sexes and that is it.

Whatever we are, gender is irrelevant to ‘it’, it is not male or female or both, or neither… Just not relevant.

Which makes some spiritual text quite useless to me when they speak about balancing the male and female energy, or the yin-yang stuff.

To be honest, I find such text hard to read and therefore when they start into that direction I just immediately leave it (but must say, reading spiritual texts has mostly lost its appetite it had 1 year ago).

And this was just that little moment and the ‘gender’ concept was ‘gone’.

I am still a man and I feel/see/experience male feelings and thoughts, but I just know fully that it is just another face/mask/front-end on top of what I am really am and ‘gender’ has no further relevancy to me except when I am wearing this mask.

Actually, that might not be fully correct. When I am in that ‘state of mind’ I do still think that the world is insane and that most is based on things that are not true and that we all put a lot of masks on.

But then other things seem to linger on for quite some time and ‘resist’ many aha moments (or better I resist those moments; I know that but knowing and not doing it is quite a different challenge…).

All quite intriguing and funny, albeit some of the sticky things I rather have resolved 😀 “

My Reply:

Your question is:

How can one improve on to not loose the underlying sense of ‘aha’ when one has such a moment but after that falls back to the old way of doing things?

How to keep the insight alive?

I seem to have quite a bit of those small aha moments but then fall back quite easily.

It just dissipates quickly to some high degree although it always leaves traces.”

Yes, why is it that a moment of clear seeing and liberation disappears shortly after the aha-moment?

The short answer would be that it happens because the identification to the false self is still stronger than the identification to our true nature.

Every aha-moment or insight into Truth or Reality cleanses away yet another layer of the untrue and this can take a while, but some of the aha-moments are instant as well and clears out a lot of crap at once.

We can all have a glimpse into who we really are and feel immense joy, peace, clarity and so on and then fall back again to the old level of consciousness simply because the new level needs time to establish itself (although Truth is not a “level”, it’s beyond all levels).

You might like this article as well: mariaerving.com/back-to-ego-consciousness-spiritual-awakening

But also sometimes the insight or aha is so big it removes multiple layers of ego consciousness all at once.

So your question is; why are most of the aha moments only momentarily? How do we ‘keep’ them, how do we keep the insights and aha moments alive? 

The ego tries to hold on to the peace, the clear seeing and so on because it thinks it can do something with it, that it’s useful for it.

In reality peace cannot be held on to, it can only be something we are, not a feeling but a beingness.

And the ego can’t ‘be’ peace or peaceful, it can only try to ‘get it’, hold on to it and control it, but despite its best efforts all it can do is to produce a false sense of peace which is always momentary and fleeting.

For example through medication, drugs, drinking etc, some kind of instant ‘high’ that will feel like peace to the ego, but obviously that’s not real peace because the real peace is abiding, something you are.

So after these profound aha-moments the ego mind creeps in after a while and takes over again, but as you also mentioned in your email the experience always leave traces, it always changes something within you, it shifts your perspective somehow and even if it’s only a little bit it’s enough to jolt you more and more out of your old identity each time you have a clear seeing.

The ignorance of your true nature can never again be fully operating in your life no matter how small or big the insight was but the mind will naturally return to its old identification for a while until all false has been cleared out.

You can never be fully deluded again because now you have seen. 

You have experienced your true nature or Reality and you now know that ignorance never presents the truth of life and existence, but at the same time you can see and observe the mind going back to the old state time after time.

But the cleaning and clearing happens at the same time too so as your spiritual awareness and understanding grows the less the egoic structure of the mind can keep its hold on you.

Whatever state of consciousness you are identified with feels very real (most of the time you don’t know you’re ignorance until you see through it) and depending on how fixed your mind is on beliefs and concepts, the longer it takes/the more difficult it is to see through them.

If you’re narrow-minded and closed and if you want to keep your beliefs and gods etc then the clear seeing will take longer to establish itself because your ego refuses to let go or look deeper.

Most people never question their beliefs, so they might need a lot of aha-moments before Truth gets to seep deeper and deeper into the mind and clear it out of the unreal.

It’s sometimes like a reflex we hold on to, a kind of sick loyalty, or neediness to the ignorant state of consciousness where we become so dependent on our beliefs that it can take years before they are finally seen through completely and then let go of.

For some this is easier, if you’re open-minded and not fixed on your beliefs, if you’re curious by nature, if you’re committed to know the Truth, if you’re willing to look even beyond the experiences themselves (and not make them into something they’re not), then it obviously takes less time. 

In reality Truth is very simple (and already here, nothing to attain, only to realize); it’s beyond all the layers of untruth and every time we have an aha, or an insight, a clear seeing and so on there’s a shift on the inside that is taking place and it always promotes growth and transformation.

It always changes and shifts something within you.

But not everyone is equally ready for the full awakening and disillusionment of the ego structure.

Some assumptions and misconceptions about ourselves and life must be exposed again and again and again before it sticks while some other moments of clear seeing clears out a lot of things at once, as your seeing through the whole gender identification.

You saw through it and it was gone. Poof. Just like that. 

I have had those types of seeings myself when concepts and beliefs has just disappeared all in one seeing and after that I could not open a book or anything about the particular concept because I had seen through it and it was gone to never again return.

Other clear seeings took me years to embody/integrate/establish fully.

Astrology for example, and God, those were my strongest beliefs I had. 

I saw through it, saw through it, saw through it, and then finally there was a final seeing and it dropped away, one by one, but it took me years.

The God-thing came back once even after I had seen through it so that can happens as well and it has all to do with how strong and fixed our beliefs are and have been and in a moment of weakness, fear or worry we can again be drawn back to the old and familiar because that’s where the ego feels most safe. 

In my case I had a very strong belief in God as well as Astrology; ever since childhood I had been interested in it and knew a lot about it so naturally the “known” (which all drop away eventually) took a bit longer to clear out because it was a fixed belief in my mind.

As human beings we have been programmed since childhood with all kinds of beliefs and so the mind has locked itself into them, fixed itself into them, and there’s an attachment to them, that’s why it can take time before Truth has done its work in us completely.

It’s really about us being stubborn and afraid of letting go of the known. 

The more deeply attached we are to our egoic self-image for example, the further away we are from seeing our true nature, so we need to go deep, we need to question everything, and most importantly our deepest beliefs, the ones we love and cherish the most.

They must be exposed, sometimes over and over again until we see with crystal clear clarity what is true and what is not.

Most of us has just accepted the conditioning that ‘I’m a man’ or ‘I’m a woman’ and the belief that we are the gender made consciousness (Truth) to misidentify with the body and thus we came to think we are this body, this gender etc.

We (consciousness) got squeezed into these tiny, fragile bodies of ours and took ourselves to be It.

But you saw through this and with this seeing it was done and you were set free so when it comes to this particular belief you might have been cleared from it, while other beliefs takes longer to clear out.

The seeing can’t be held on to, but all it really requires is an willingness to be wrong (about life and who we are) and to be naked, containing nothing – not even the most cherished beliefs can stay, they all have to be seen through.

So it’s not about trying to keep them, but to see through them over and over again until there is nothing but Truth left to see.

And the more beliefs you see through the faster it goes, it starts a snowball effect because when one belief or belief-system is undressed, the others becomes easier to see through as well and when you do it becomes easier to drop them too.

That’s when you might have a lot of insights and aha-moments about a lot of things in life.

I have had periods in my life when those types of insights and clear seeings has happened as popcorn popping in my mind, one by one with rapid speed I have been shown what is real and what is not and thus it became clear to me that no beliefs are real and that Truth lies beyond them all.

Today I can’t take any belief as real, it’s impossible for me because I have seen through them all.

This is liberation; the freedom from beliefs and ideas; everything ‘known’.  

Enlightenment is behind the veil of the known
Enlightenment is behind/beyond the veil of the known.

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