How To Listen To Your Intuition

How to sense the difference between intuition and the voice of ego:

BODY:

There are ways in which we can learn how to sense the difference and start making wiser decisions for ourselves and one of them is to listen to your body and how it feels in regards to something you’re about to do or get into etc.

Sense if there’s an expansion within you or if you feel you’re contracting, sense the difference between the dropping of energy and where there’s a surge of energy within you.

That’s the difference between your own true ‘yes’ and ‘no’.

“Yes” feels expansive, like life comes out through you towards something (like a flow of energy coming out), and “no” feels like your shrinking or you feel that your energy just dropped.

If you go ahead and do the thing that makes you contract you’re going against your own inner wisdom so don’t do it no matter what you think it will get you. 

Always trust if something feels toxic or ‘wrong/off’, because it’s unhealthy to stay in any kind of situation or relationship that feels toxic or somehow yucky.

Notice if you’re feeling excited/uplifted/energized, or drawn toward doing one thing over another, then do go in that direction, and also notice any feelings of dread etc and realize that those are are signals not to proceed with something.

These sensations can all be felt in your body and your emotional response if you pay attention. It’s really about fine-tuning this instrument of yours and to have the guts to follow it. 

A great way to develop your intuition is to become aware of what’s happening right now in every encounter or situation you find yourself in; become aware of your “first impressions”and also goosebumps.

Goosebumps are usually a physical confirmation of something being true, or an agreement within you that says “this is true”, this resonates with the truth within me”.

You might like this article: mariaerving.com/barometer-for-truth

CONTEMPLATE OPTIONS:

When faced with a decision or dilemma that feels very uncomfortable or uneasy you can stop for a moment and ask yourself what your fear is telling you versus what your intuition is telling you.

Say to yourself:

“My fear is telling me that..” and “my intuition is telling me that..” and see how you feel happier and more alive when you listen to your intuition and more miserable and empty/dead when you listen to your fear. (Always go with the life affirming option).

Another thing you can do is to close your eyes for a moment and go within and remember a time when you made a decision, any decision, and see how your life could have looked so different now if you had done one thing or chosen one path over another.

This will help you see clearly that our choices really are life altering (doesn’t matter how small or big they are) and that every moment is a moment of choice. 

Think of all the different directions life could have taken if you had done something that was against your intuitive knowing!

And this applies also the other way around; think of a time when you decided to follow your heart even if you felt scared and completely out of your comfort zone. 

If you can’t find any examples, then ask yourself “Show me the unfolding of times when I have followed my gut” and you will be shown memories from times when you have been true to yourself and what happened/how the unfolding happened.

Remember how if felt when you trusted and followed your intuition. 

You can also go back and remember a time when you were warned about something; what happened? See it clearly and you can see how it pays off to listen to your gut the first time around. 

This will make it easier to handle your dilemma or make a decision.

You might like this article: mariaerving.com/how-to-deal-with-dilemmas-and-insecurities

OLD PROGRAMMING AND CONDITIONING:

We have been taught to ‘stop and think’ and to gather information before we go ahead and do something.

As children we are taught that everything needs to be explained and everything must make sense and our intuitive wisdom has been mostly neglected as we’ve been taught to consider more “rational” things to have more value.

And by doing that instead of following our nudges and insights we have learned to turn to our rational/surface mind for guidance but the rational mind will always present to us solutions which are pretty much all based on past experiences and the times when we ‘failed’. 

It will basically drag something up from memory and present it to you and if you believe in it, that memory will prevent you from taking any kind of new action.

Or it will tell you that you should only trust your five senses (what you see and experience as being the only reality there is) and that the thing you want to do is not possible because this or that.

(Like for example “I don’t have enough money”, “I don’t know the right people” or “I can’t do that, who am I to think I can do something like that?”).

Try out living more spontaneously and just do things (without having to know or explain everything), even for a day or two try it out for yourself to see how it feels.

That will help you become more aware of the thoughts (based on memories) that pop up that prevents you from moving forward with something.

Giving away your power thinking your rational mind knows the Truth about something is just as bad as giving it away to other people by thinking they know what’s best for you.

If you allow yourself to listen to what other people think is possible for you, notice how what they say is the total opposite of what your heart is telling you; isn’t that interesting?

Notice how they judge you and call you egoistic or inconsiderate because you want to do something different than they.

They are probably unconsciously behaving that way towards you but as soon as you catch them in doing that you can chose to simply be aware of it and turn even more to your own inner knowing, recognizing that what you see is a bunch of egos trying to belittle and intimidate your ego, but you know that’s not who you are so you need not be affected by any of that. 

Being stuck in old programming can also prevent you from seeing something in a new light if you are skeptical and close-minded.

To be skeptical is great (we should ask and investigate things for ourselves and not take other peoples word for the truth), but it’s not healthy to be skeptical only about new things but never about anything old.

Think about how being curious opens up life more; curious about other people and how they function and think is interesting, wouldn’t you agree?

It not only opens up the communication flow between people but we also come to discover new things about ourselves in that process. 

A memory comes to mind just now about when I was young and was struggling with math, because I could know the answer to an assignment but I couldn’t explain how I knew it, so they thought I cheated, and then the ability I had to be able to solve some mathematical assignment was never allowed to be explored or developed. 

So to always do things the way they have always been done is restricting us on fundamental levels of living, and to give away your power to believing only what you see (what your rational mind tells you) or continuously asking other people about your life is also to give your power away.

Forget about tarot cards readings, psychics, astrology, “all-knowing”- gurus, and so forth, and turn within instead of asking others “What do you think, should I do it?” or ”Is this the best for me?”

Change it around and ask yourself “Is this the best thing for me?” and learn to trust yourself.

You might like this article: mariaerving.com/break-free-from-programming

STILLNESS:

For some being alone is painful and very much resisted.

They always want to have some distractions or noise around them (like TV/other people etc) but we need to be still to hear and develop our intuition.

And there’s nothing ‘spiritual’ about it.

It’s simply the ability and willingness to be with yourself and listen to yourself and anyone can do it.

Learn to be quiet and turn off the TV or laptop and when you do actually take time to just be with yourself in stillness you will experience heightened awareness that might first startle you or even scare you (some people are afraid of their own mind/thoughts) if you haven’t quietened your mind before, but very soon you will discover that there’s a deep peace there and from that place the insights can begin to come forth.

You’d be amazed if you knew how many people prefer noise before silence and how many people prefer having someone (like a psychic) telling them something they think is “the answer” instead of going within and get the real answer from there.

I just had a conversation with someone whom I have suggested to start writing a journal and to start asking herself some really deep questions and meditate etc as I know she’s going through a very difficult time at the moment, and just recently after I have suggested this for a couple of years (!) she finally did the question exercise (my get tells me she gave it only a few minutes though) and then later when we spoke again she shares with me that she’s going to a psychic soon.. it’s just beyond me. 

She will suffer and struggle until the day when she takes back her own power, and until then she will continue looking for the answers outside of herself.

But that’s her journey, I’m not here to twist anybody’s arm. 

Inspiration and insights, just like intuition, strikes when you are relaxed and in a quiet, receptive mental state.

Stillness is where all solutions comes from but this is the last place the ego wants to go. 

You might like this article: mariaerving.com/dont-approach-your-inner-self-intellectually

RESISTANCE:

You know something you don’t want to know. That’s where the suffering comes from.

You know you should have left him/her ages ago, but you’re still with them.

You just don’t like what your intuition is telling you (or you fear the consequences/changes that will happen when going with your gut) so you chose to not listen to it.

But it will tell you, louder and louder. Not in a demanding way, but it will tell you straight out if you need to leave a certain job, relationship, situation and so forth, because it cares about you.

It’s telling you the truth about your life and you’re not listening!

Trusting your intuition will lead you in new directions and open doors that you might not have otherwise opened and walked though, or even seen, but they are there, even right now actually they are there.

You’re just not aware of them, but the awareness comes from the first step you take in the direction of your heart, then you’ll discover that it has always been there but you didn’t see it. 

Trusting your intuition is the key that unlocks any door, and acting on it allows you to walk through the doorway to a new situation.

Don’t second guess yourself; either you like and trust someone or you don’t. Either a situation repels you or it interests you. Whatever it is, you already know what you need to know.

Trust the messages you receive.

And if you have to (and still feel unsure), sleep on it. You’ll know the answer in the morning.

The more aware you are the more your will awaken your intuition and also act on it, so don’t be afraid of making mistakes or making the ‘wrong decision’, that’s how we learn and grow.

Intuition is your true voice and you can absolutely trust it. 

You might like this article: mariaerving.com/why-most-dont-trust-intuition

cute kitten

Here’s an adorable little kitten I found the other day at a garbage place.

It has now found a new loving home thanks to Costa Animal Society here in Nerja.

Talk to me.

Transformational Coaching and Energy Work with Maria Erving
Transformational Coaching and Energy Work with Maria

You have been an amazing addition to my life!

Thank you for all of the wonderful light, and love that you send out into the world. You are indeed an inspiration even though we are half way across the world – isn’t that wonderful! It is a privilege that is not taken lightly. Thank you Maria! 

Ruby Coleman Professional Musician and Actress, Memphis, Tennessee, USA

Comments

  1. Pingback: The Transformative Power of Prayer · Maria Erving :: Maria Erving

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  3. Sharon

    Hi Maria! Thank you for your kind reply on the other article I originally commented on and also for recommending this one – I absolutely loved it! I really appreciate your insight and honesty, you tell it like it is and it’s so refreshing to read.

    I can also totally relate to what you said about our ego jumping to the forefront when we bring looking inwards. To avoid getting too lengthy, basically I started my spiritual awakening so to speak earlier this year, which was really difficult at a point but learning so much (a lot of those concepts and more you write about in such a relatable, direct, and eloquent way!) gave me a lot of clarity.

    Over the past 2 months or so, I felt a huge roadblock and my life didn’t feel as peaceful and effortless. Looking back I had started victimizing myself and feeling like I was stuck where I am with no hope in going towards any of the directions I envisioned for myself. I started to prioritize some of my self-care less (meditating, journaling, doing fun things) because I started a new semester of school, but I wasn’t even really committing myself to my studies much either.

    It dawned on me a couple of days ago, I think this was from a LOT of resistance from my ego in making the real changes in my thoughts and actions and putting in the effort to move forward.

    I feel like maybe this is another layer I’m moving deeper into (hence the resistance) and was wondering if you had any tips to offer? After realizing this, I am definitely consciously committed to working on distinguishing and releasing thoughts/tension from my ego and listening/reconnecting for my intuition to guide me. I read your article about your journaling process too, which was also a really helpful! I know there isn’t a perfect set of guidelines or to-do’s that can magically take us to a place of greater spiritual awareness but I feel like while I never want to stop learning, I also need to be taking some action if I want to truly keep growing instead of just dabbling with the idea of it.

    Journaling and meditating more definitely sound like great places to start, and was wondering your thoughts and if you happened to have any recommendations? I apologize if this comment was a bit vague, I felt a little bad about how long it already was! Thank you so much! I really appreciate anything you might have to suggest 🙂

  4. You’re so very welcome 🙂

    Yes, you are a bit vague, I’m not sure what to reply to.

    Spiritual awakening is not about learning much, but more about unlearning – a lot. (Everything, basically)

    Not sure what you mean when you wrote that you have been learning a lot.

    What are those things about?

    It would help me understand where you are better if you shared more about those things.

    With that said;

    You will learn a lot of spiritual and personal development stuff for a while but the deeper you go in to the awakening process, the more you will start to unlearn and undo.

    And when you have awakened, the learning/seeking stops completely.

    Obviously you will still continue to evolve/grow but you will learn about completely different things.

    Moving on;

    The feeling stuck about moving towards what you have envisioned for yourself is very common.

    Simply because you (or the false self) will not get what you want, but Life (which is who you really are) will get what It wants, through you.

    Regarding the journaling process I’ve described in some of my older articles, I don’t personally do any of that anymore.

    Those things fall away with awakening.

    I still write, but not in that way anymore.

    It’s more like simply living life and responding to the call of the moment (be in flow with it), so the communication is immediate and direct.

    It was however a great thing for me to do at the time I did journaling that way, so it’s still something I recommend to others.

    Writing is always good when it comes to connecting with the Truth of your being, and sometimes just sitting in stillness if just as effective.

    I’m not sure what you meant when you asked if I have any recommendations about journaling and meditation, could you be more specific?

    I have so many articles about those things here on my website. Have a browse around 🙂

    (Or let me know more specifically what you’re “struggling” with (what you want to learn/what challenges you have) and then I might be able to point you to some articles).

    And check your email for a little something from me.. 🙂

  5. Sharon

    Hi Maria! Thank you so much for your reply and for your email, I was so surprised but also so deeply grateful for your generous and kind gift! 🙂

    Yes I would love to elaborate, it’s actually kind of funny because literally the day after I posted my comment I felt completely differently but didn’t know how to edit or delete it so I figured I could just wait for your reply.

    But I’d love to answer your questions first:

    In case you’ve heard of it, I read Conversations with God earlier this year and a lot a lot of what’s in that book really resonated with me. There are topics and ideas in there that are similar to some of the things you write about in your recent articles, not at all to compare you and the book, but more as a testament to how much I like both sources of writing.

    When I said “learning” I think a more accurate term would be remembering/coming home to what the true nature of our being truly is. In a nutshell two of the things from that book that have been hanging out in the back of my mind recently are that “enlightenment” is the realization that I don’t have to be or do anything more than who I am in this very moment, and also to consciously create my thoughts, words and actions to shape the reality I’d like to live and the person I’d like to become. I’d also be more than happy to elaborate more on other stuff from the book, I figured it might help save some space to mention it in case you’ve already read it 🙂

    As for how I felt the day after I posted to your website, it was really weird because it almost felt like I had forgotten or disconnected from parts of myself? For lack of a better description, kind of like floating in space, but not in a bad way, it’s actually been kind of nice. I noticed that it’s been much, much easier to identify when thoughts and feelings are coming from my ego/resistance, to step back from them, and see them from a third person perspective. It’s almost like watching myself as a little kid throw a fit and then having to tell her, “ok I know you’re upset right now but we (as in myself as a collective being) aren’t going to do that right now” where as normally, I’d fall into that energy and just be sad/angry/irritated/etc.

    I don’t know if maybe that’s a good sign of my ego taking a back seat for once or not? I had a hard time really pinning down what exactly my ego was for awhile so I could be totally wrong on that assumption too haha

    Also throughout the past couple of days, there has been a lot of feeling like wow that doesn’t resonate with me at all anymore with regards to thoughts I’d entertain or negative stories I used to let myself get caught up in so I can definitely relate to the way you mentioned we have cycles of creating visions for ourselves only to find they aren’t true anymore (I think I’m having that happen again right now with something I thought I was interested in pursuing lol)

    I think before I felt like I had to do a lot of work to get to know more about myself and I was thinking I couldn’t motivate myself lately because I was lazy, but now I’m wondering if it’s something else like maybe I’ve outgrown it in the way you mentioned? Quite honestly I don’t really feel like I want to do any personal development stuff anymore because it just feels kinda contrived and unnatural. I had some writing exercises for a small program to help learn more about yourself that I had been putting off and while I think it’d be cool to finish, it doesn’t at all have the allure it did when I started.

    I wish I could be more elaborate with the “floating in space” headspace I’ve been in lately, but it’s kind of like my mind has been more empty and it’s been a bit of a relief because I think I used to distract myself a lot from thoughts I didn’t want to face. I guess I’ve interpreted it as not a bad thing and I could just follow it to wherever it takes me and in the meantime, just do things that I want to do and make me happy (which I haven’t really made time for) like taking walks outside, meditating more, trying fun things, etc. and make sure I’m taking good care of myself.

    I think a great place for me to start would be just as you said, to start unlearning because there is so much from my past that I would love to finally release. Would you happen to have any articles you’d recommend for this?

    Also as an aside do you think it’s possible to unlearn things from the subconscious on their own? I know people go to “specialists” for the subconscious, but I feel like there must be a way to unlearn those things without paying a lot of money even if it might be more difficult lol. I don’t remember a lot from my childhood even though I’m pretty young, but I do know that there’s a lot of negative stuff from that time that no longer serves me and I’d like to unlearn and was curious how you’d approach it?

    I wish I was a bit more articulate/specific so I hope this doesn’t come across as fake or not genuine at all. I really appreciate your openness to listen and offer your thoughts! I have so much respect for the really genuine sense of knowing that you embody and I would love to start relying on myself more to reach a similar place of higher knowing. Thank you again so much and I hope you have a wonderful day!

  6. Thank you Sharon, now I have a clearer picture of where you are.

    In the beginning it’s the ego who does all the spiritual stuff, who reads all the books and takes all the action and this can go on for years before the awakening process begins.

    My suggestion would be that you begin asking within yourself where the Truth of You is in all this; to start doing self-inquiry, and inquiry into Truth.

    Here’s a few articles for you that will be helpful:

    http://mariaerving.com/about-self-inquiry/

    http://mariaerving.com/who-am-i/

    http://mariaerving.com/self-awareness-questions/

    You wrote:

    “It’s almost like watching myself as a little kid throw a fit and then having to tell her, “ok I know you’re upset right now but we (as in myself as a collective being) aren’t going to do that right now” where as normally, I’d fall into that energy and just be sad/angry/irritated/etc.

    I don’t know if maybe that’s a good sign of my ego taking a back seat for once or not?”

    Yes, this is a good sign, definitely.

    You’re in the process of seeing through the ego’s temper tantrums and hissy fits and starting to realize that it’s not you.

    The next step for you would be to look into who the observer of the ego is.

    The links I gave you earlier will be helpful for you in this process.

    You wrote:

    “.. maybe I’ve outgrown it in the way you mentioned? Quite honestly I don’t really feel like I want to do any personal development stuff anymore because it just feels kinda contrived and unnatural.”

    Many people find me when they have come to the point in their personal and spiritual growth when they realize that nothing they have done, or do, really works, so they start to go deeper, into true spiritual growth.

    Here’s a few articles that came to mind, see if you can relate to any of them:

    http://mariaerving.com/spiritual-ambition/

    http://mariaerving.com/spiritual-awakening-and-losing-interest/

    http://mariaerving.com/spiritual-practices-not-relevant-anymore/

    Here’s another one:

    http://mariaerving.com/mind-gets-emptied-with-spiritual-surrender/

    And this one:

    http://mariaerving.com/ego-panics-1/

    The last one might not be relevant to you, but maybe it is, have a look to see if there’s anything there that can be helpful to you when it comes to understanding the construct of the ego.

    Lastly, you mentioned releasing the past.

    That automatically happens when you go deeper into the spiritual awakening process.

    Sometimes, or many times, many people need to go through their healing journey before the awakening process can take off for real (they have to face their darkness and deal with it).

    This happens because many times the person has to be built up/healed if they have a lot of trauma or issues from the past that are still haunting them so that they become strong enough to go through the awakening process.

    That happened to me too; I had to go through my healing journey of over 2 years of rehab before the awakening process could take off because if it had happened earlier I wouldn’t have been strong enough to be able to handle it.

    Many times though people try to avoid this process (the healing journey) because they refuse to deal with their pains and suffering.

    So they turn to spirituality in order to avoid the “bad stuff” and think that they can just ‘create a wonderful life with their thoughts’ and never have to deal with their issues.

    But whatever stuff there is, it needs to be cleaned up before you can have the ‘good life’ you say you want to have (I’m speaking generally now, for all people).

    At the same time; whatever past traumas and issues there is, it belongs to the ego/false self, and when the false self starts to unravel, so does the traumas and pains as well.

    You wrote:

    “Also as an aside do you think it’s possible to unlearn things from the subconscious on their own? I know people go to “specialists” for the subconscious, but I feel like there must be a way to unlearn those things without paying a lot of money even if it might be more difficult.”

    Yes, you can do it yourself but I recommend booking a series of healing sessions.

    Learn more about healing sessions with me here:

    http://mariaerving.com/sessions/
    You wrote:

    “I don’t remember a lot from my childhood even though I’m pretty young, but I do know that there’s a lot of negative stuff from that time that no longer serves me and I’d like to unlearn and was curious how you’d approach it?”

    Here’s a free PDF for you that can be helpful for you when it comes to resolving and letting go of your past.

    Go to page 7 and read about a very powerful exercise there:

    http://mariaerving.com/the-power-of-forgiveness-and-acceptance-free-pdf

    I always share this with people, it’s very powerful.

    It was very powerful for me when I went through my healing journey, but of course everything I did back then played its part in my healing journey;

    All the Reiki healing I received (this was when I was in rehab when I was around 29-31 years old), all the countless group therapy sessions and hours and hours of psychotherapy and gestalt therapy etc.

    But this exercise was what finally helped me over the whole issue and that set me free once and for all.

    So I hope it will be helpful to you as well.

    Okay, I think you have plenty to read now so I’m going to leave you with that 🙂

    Keep me updated on how things go with you and feel very welcome to continue the conversation if you want to, or start a new one below any of the other articles and we’ll take it from there.

    Also let me know if you have any questions or if you want to clarify something etc and I’ll be happy to talk more and help you further.

  7. Ajit Menon

    Great article…good to realize the distinction between the two voices. I have also felt that the voice of the intuition is always subtle…it doesn’t present a sense of urgency to get up and do something quickly, it is calm. It never regrets anything when you don’t listen to it and it has no guilt about things that have happened in the past. This may be why it feels expansive. It is patient. Even if you don’t listen to it, it never abandons you and it is always there to tap into when needed. Anyway, this is what it feels like to me…thought I would share that.

  8. Glad to hear it resonated with you Ajit 😊

    Yes, it can be subtle, but it can also be very prompt and clear, for example if we’re in a situation where we’re in some kind of danger.

    Then it’s very “loud” so that we can hear its warning and do something before anything undesirable happens.

    You might like this post as well:

    http://mariaerving.com/how-inner-wisdom-speaks/

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