How To Love Yourself

How To Love Yourself

The riddle of your life can be solved by you clicking into place with yourself, and by being true to yourself that’s exactly what happens.

But many times, in most people’s lives, self-doubt, timidity, (unhealthy) perfectionism, and other things like fear and procrastination, which are the ego’s clever ways of distracting you and getting you off your true path, they get in the way and hinder the natural flow of life. 

The ego gives you all kinds of ideas on how you can make excuses for yourself (“I’ll do it later, tomorrow, or when the kids have grown up” are popular ones), or it feeds you with things that promotes addiction (alcohol, drugs, Internet and social media addictive behavior etc) in order to keep you distracted. 

The ego will always be able to find something that justifies its choices for you if you don’t take charge over your own decision making.

I don’t know. I don’t feel really inspired right now, I’ll wait a while, maybe I feel like doing it tomorrow, I really feel like not doing anything today. I’ll look at it tomorrow.”


Except that that day never comes, have you noticed? It’s always tomorrow or ‘later’.

How long have you been waiting to get “inspired” to get your ass off that couch?

Here’s the thing;

You can either do things out of inspiration (heart/soul’s desire) or you can wait and then be forced to do something from a place of pure motivation instead, which many times comes from fear and necessity; because you ‘have to’.

And that usually is because you didn’t do anything when the thought (inspiration) of doing something first came to you.

That is the inspiration you are waiting for by the way.

Your part in all this is to take it and run with it and when you do, that’s when it grows, but at first it can be a little inclination, a spark of inspiration that ignites new hope or confidence in you.

Most people ignore or dismiss this because they are waiting for a big eureka moment that will thrust them into a whirlwind of intense passion that they believe will transform their lives in an instant without them having to do any ‘heavy lifting’ or difficult choices.

The everyday choices we make for ourselves is what shows us how much or little we love ourselves. 

As long as we go with the ego it can (and many times will) lead a person to some level of self-loathing that just keeps them further and further away from a healthy, loving relationship with themselves.

It can be things like guilty feelings, regret, frustration with yourself, overeating or drinking in attempts to control your emotional state, depression, and so on.

How To Love Yourself:

First of all, and this is the Number One thing that you cannot get away from or not do. You must do this.

Forgive yourself.

Forgive yourself for how you have treated yourself and others and for the mistakes you have made in the past.

There’s nothing you can do about certain things other than to forgive and let go.

Release what you can’t change if it’s too late to amend and make right again.

Be sure you have let yourself off the hook of unforgiveness.

You’re a different person right now in this moment and the choice you make now can alter the direction of your life in ways you cannot even imagine once you’ve cleared yourself from past wrongdoings and mistakes, both conscious and unconscious.

Having regrets is a waste of time.

Okay, so you made a mistake, maybe even a huge mistake, or a lot of mistakes, a whole bunch of them, but it’s done, you did it, now own it and let it go.

You simply have to.

Look at the alternative; how has that worked out for you so far?

Forgive and let go. 

Stop the self-abuse!

I see this mostly in women and it makes me cringe when I hear women talk down on themselves, even in casual conversations.

Don’t ever call yourself names! Don’t call yourself stupid and don’t verbally abuse your body either by saying you’re fat and ugly or whatever.

How disgracing!

Don’t ever again talk negatively about yourself in any way.

Appreciate yourself and your body.

I think it’s a tendency for women especially to talk down on themselves in the presence of others in order to make the others feel better about themselves or more comfortable (this is a way of getting approval, which the ego seeks).

But both men and women do this at times; they try to compensate the other persons confidence, or power, by emphasizing their own weaknesses because they unconsciously believe it will make the other person more comfortable (or more comfortable to be around).

In reality the person who showcases her/his weaknesses or ‘faults’ in front of a confident individual is only giving their power away (it’s not balancing anything out), and the reason for this is because they are afraid of their own power. 

They are afraid of looking too confident or too powerful or even boastful, and because it’s important for the ego to feel approved of and liked, it makes itself a little bit smaller (“weaker”).

This is when the relationship between people gets off balance; because one or both parts are afraid of being who they are.

They are being afraid of how the other person will perceive them so they try to be in control by for example making jokes about themselves (or others) in a self-loathing/degrading way in an attempt to feel comradery and connectedness.  

It’s false of course, we can all see that, but sometimes this behavior can be very subtle and even totally unconscious. 

The solution is to accept yourself, your body, personality, strengths and weaknesses without making them wrong as they are all part of your unique setup.

And if you secretly might even like yourself (as many also do but are afraid to say) then dare to focus on that (express self-love unapologetically) and put more attention on developing your skills, talents and abilities instead of focusing on what your ego points out to be ‘wrong’ about you.

One way it loves to bring forth the weak spots in you (which are not weaknesses at all in reality) is to compare you with others that are ‘more this or that’.

Just forget about it! Don’t listen to that voice. 

You’re fine. Totally fine.

Don’t listen to any self-loathing voices in your head, listen to the voice of Truth instead that guides you to make better choices for yourself.

.. Which brings me to the next point;


To love yourself means you have to learn to say no when something is not in your best interest or when someone is not good/healthy for you.

Honor yourself by doing what is right for you, by making your own choices based on your own values, and don’t worry about hurting someone else’s feelings.

It’s time to stop ignoring your own needs and start setting boundaries and some standards for yourself.

Evaluate your relationships and get real with yourself.

Are they good for you to hang around with or to be associated with?

Do they bring you down, are they Drama Queens or Kings, are they mostly in a negative frame of mind, depressed, but never doing anything about it?

Do they complain a lot and are they subtly resentful towards you because you choose to look at life from the bright side, or because you choose to do things differently?

Is there always discussions going on between you where you feel the need to defend or explain yourself over and over again?

When do you laugh and have fun?

I mean authentic fun, fun without any props like alcohol, drugs, gossiping, or endless TV watching/commenting and no real communication.

Are you truly enjoying their company?

If not then you know what to do.

And if it’s family (and you want to have them in your life) then you can make some space for yourself by creating a distance between you that allows you to be who you are.

Let them do their thing and you do yours – you don’t necessary have to mix and be around/with them as much as you have in the past or think you ‘should’ in the future. 

And the truth is that they will probably never understand you, so just let that need or wish go and feel the liberation that comes from accepting that they might never ‘get you’ or even accept you fully for who you are. 

Choose to mingle and surround yourself with people who believe in you, people who see your greatness and who have an optimistic outlook on life in general.

Real friends wants to know the real you and they are supportive and caring.

Here’s a few powerful and transformational questions to ask yourself.

Exercise: (Get a pen and paper)

Finish this sentence, list 5-8 things that immediately comes up for you:

Relationships/friendships are a source of _______ 


Finish this sentence, list 5-8 things that immediately comes up for you:

My ideal relationship/friendship is _______

And then look at the reality of how things really are by asking yourself:

Why is she/he in my life?

Why am I friends with them? Why do I have them in my life?

Be ruthlessly honest with yourself, even if it embarrasses you.

Self-awareness can sometimes point out to us that our true intentions might not have been so noble and pure after all.. just sayin’.

Be honest. 

“Why is she/he in my life?”

After you have answered the questions, see if there’s a match between your friendship/relationship with someone and your values.

For example; if you wrote that friendships are a source of support, or laughter and fun, or whatever it may be for you personally; look at the reality of your relationships.

Are they (in reality) a source of support, laughter and fun, or is there most of the time a lot of drama and them not even seeing who you are?

Your passion, your work or vocation and the time before success

There will be people around you – even family and very close friends – who don’t see what you’re doing, the great things, the focus and determination you have and how you have worked day and night for your dream, because it threatens them to see someone doing what they feel called to do when they aren’t doing that themselves. 

Embrace the fact that you need people who will be there with you on to the next level of your life.

Leave the naysayers behind and make space between you and the people who only choose to see the ‘you’ that they feel comfortable in seeing (the small self), make room for yourself.

Which brings me to my last point,..

Spend some time alone (starting today, not tomorrow or when the kids have grown up), and tune in on your needs; your wants, and your desires.

Don’t let other people define you or tell you what you should do or not do, what you should want, what you need or what/who you should prioritize before yourself. 

Be true to yourself, honor yourself, love yourself.

And be prepared that this will likely make you unpopular or not very much liked; people will talk about you, resent or ridicule you, and their ego’s might have the power to drag you right back in to the old if your not aware. 

See any disturbance as a little storm whipped up the wounded ego consciousness that is trying to assert itself back into the drivers seat of your life.

The more love you show yourself and the more you honor your own needs and wants, the more the world will react because its base is in fear and when someone suddenly appreciate and love themselves they are a threat to the status quo

Stand strong and tall and stay clear-headed and you will be fine.

More than fine. 😊

La Maroma mountain
My ‘office’ right now. Isn’t it beautiful? I’m back in Sayalonga with the cats again and I’m loving it! 🙂


Here’s even more articles for you to read that has to do with #BeTrueToYourself


The whole session felt as if it was operating on another level

If you can trust one thing in your life right now, trust Maria. You can trust her with your heart and soul. It’s hard to explain, the whole session felt as if it was operating on another level. I’ve never had that kind of experience before. It just felt so much bigger than I anticipated. I can tell you with absolute honesty and conviction that having a session with Maria is life-changing!

– Lisa, USA

Her unique ability to read your state helped me to breakthrough

Maria’s intuitive abilities have been instrumental to the personal growth I’ve experienced as a result of working together. I’ve had HUGE shifts in my beliefs. Her undivided attention, presence and unique ability to read your state helped me to breakthrough and release old patterns and replace them with new self-empowering practices that have truly shifted my life. I would highly recommend Maria to anyone. I am forever changed and forever grateful!

Joanna, USA

Could not more highly recommend

Maria is the real deal. You will sense it the moment you lay eyes on her. She offered much, much more than I’ve derived from other teachers; highly specific and personal recommendations. It is as though I got a crash graduate course from spirit. Could not more highly recommend!

Catherine Rondeau, Westport, Connecticut, USA

You have really made a difference in how my mind works

I don’t know if I make sense, but all I can say is that I feel blissful. And I can’t thank you enough for that. I don’t know exactly how you managed this, but you have really made a difference in how my mind works.

– Silvia, Marbella, Spain

I needed help in getting my life back

From the first sentence you spoke directly related to what I was going through, I felt so uplifted and light. It still blows me away when I think about it now! Never once did I feel judged, or uncomfortable in any way. I feel like this heavy weight of negativity has fallen away from me and I couldn’t get those awful feelings back if I tried. I can’t stress enough what a gift it is to be able to work with somebody like Maria. Talk about amazing grace!

Something happened within me that I cannot explain

After our session, something happened within me that I cannot explain nor would it even make sense to anyone. There was a part of me that felt my being been taken over by a real peacefulness that I’ve never encountered before. Sounds odd but it’s the truth.

– A.

I was taken over by a peacefulness

After our session, something happened within me that I cannot explain nor would it even make sense to anyone. There was a part of me that felt my being been taken over by a real peacefulness that I’ve never encountered before. Sounds odd but it’s the truth.

Maria helped me recreate my life

Maria is amazing. She is a gift to this world with an incredible intuitive ability. She has helped me to refocus my energy and recreate my life.

C. Málaga, Spain

My life has changed dramatically

Since plugging in to your words of wisdom my life has changed dramatically. You pointed me in the right direction and that gave me courage to continue moving through whatever process I may find myself in and the ability to take refuge in the truth within me.

Connecting with you is magical

Maria THANK YOU. Sometimes just by connecting with you even briefly gives me instant clarity, it’s really magical, thank you so much. I trust your guidance so much, I’m just so grateful!

I’ve never had a conversation like that before

I just wanted to say thank you so much again for our session yesterday, I’ve never had a conversation like that before and it was truly amazing. I could feel weight lifted as we were talking and for the first time my mind did not try to make sense of things, it was all truly felt in the heart space.

Val, Melbourne, Australia

More transformational than any other thing that I’ve tried

I highly recommend Maria! I don’t even recognize the person who started working with her a few months ago. Maria clearly sees what is blocking, stopping or limiting you. Working with her has been more transformational than any other thing that I’ve tried. There have been profound shifts in the way I see myself and the world, so many shifts in my energy and life. I find myself so much lighter and freer. Thank you Maria!

Britt, Marbella, Spain

My life has radically changed for the better

I finally know my worth. I feel so different now, I feel lighter, happier and more self confident and it’s easy to let go of people and situations that don’t serve me. I treasure the time I spend talking with Maria and look forward to my sessions with her. There has been big changes in my life, synchronicities showing up like magic and I’m constantly blown away at the business and opportunities that I’m attracting. My life has radically changed for the better after I met Maria.

— Robin, New York, USA

The feeling of peace and freedom is priceless

With only that one session and the healing she carried out, I’ve been without grudges, feelings of being hurt or anything on those lines. This feeling of peace and freedom is priceless. Maria is beyond amazing. Had I not experienced it myself, I would probably not believe it. I recommend anyone who is trying hard to be truly free and really start walking down the path of self fulfillment and happiness to book a session with her.

I cannot believe what you were able to achieve in one session

I don’t really know where to start. I find myself at a loss for words. All I can say to you is Thank You. This was unlike any healing session that I have ever been in and I say that from the bottom of my skeptical, over analytical heart who had literally tried everything one could think of. I cannot recommend you enough to other people, you are a gift. I also cannot believe what you were able to achieve in one session, to me it is groundbreaking. Thank you!!!

Rosie Bebawi, Marbella, Spain

I certainly did not expect this

I certainly did not expect this, l have had periods of such intense joy and bliss, Love with an underlying peace that’s been consistent. l don’t understand it intellectually but my heart see’s it clearly. It’s been wonderful, I feel a true sense of connection and being rooted with in and there is just an openness and trust, and a sense of wonder and amazement. I am truly grateful, Thank you. Sincerely.

Mark Neely, Allentown, Pennsylvania, USA

Thank you, Maria!

I couldn’t be more grateful to have Maria in my life. Her guidance and energy is profound!

– Robert, CA, USA

A calm came over me

I could feel the tension leaving my body and a calm came over me by just being in her presence. Everything flows so naturally with her and my life is more beautiful and I feel at peace knowing I have her by my side. I feel blessed to have her in my life.

Cecilia, Stockholm, Sweden

I had a complete turnaround to my situation

The distance healing was amazing. I had a complete turnaround to my situation so many thanks for helping me transform something I had lost hope about. It’s a miracle and the outcome could not have turned out better! If you want to see a real shift not just psychological but spiritual shift, then Maria is the lady to see. I am so glad I found you!

– Sophie P

Can’t recommend her enough!

Working with Maria was one of the best investments I ever made in myself. I’ve seen immediate shifts in my energy as well as learned to work with my own energy and mind. It has been one of the single most transformational experiences of my life. Can’t recommend her enough!

– Chris, USA

I experienced a PROFOUND shift 

I can’t put into words how much you have helped me. I couldn’t have kept it all together had I not experienced a PROFOUND shift during and after my session with you.

 I am so glad that I reached out to you

Maria, you are truly godsend. I cannot describe how happy I am. I have no idea what you did and how you did, but I am truly grateful to you. My words in this email cannot thank you enough. Today is the first day that I woke up feeling as if I am ready to take on the world. I am so glad that I reached out to you. I am truly grateful to you. I will definitely recommend you to my friends and family!


Profound shift

I can’t put into words how much you have helped me. I couldn’t have kept it all together had I not experienced a PROFOUND shift during and after my session with you.

You are truly a gift to us all!

I can’t even begin to express how much I have gained internally after my session with you. You have been an instrument of peace in my life. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

– Owen, USA

Maria is leading people to a new way of being

Maria is changing the world by her presence. She’s leading people to a new way of being. She’s rare because she’s able to see where you are at in your journey and can show you the way forward. I feel so incredibly grateful that she has been a companion during this time of change. If you feel drawn to connect with Maria I encourage you to move forward with confidence.

– Carolyn W. Asheville, NC, USA

It was more than I could ever hoped for or expected

My experience with Maria was more than I could ever hoped for or expected. I had such a positive experience working with her. I feel like a huge weight have been lifted and I have so much more perspective on what I have been struggling with. She cleared up my energy and I feel more myself, more at peace and all around better mentally and emotionally since my sessions with her.

Miriam, Espoo, Finland

I have never felt more aligned to my true self

Maria’s awareness of energies and the conditions of the mind are truly impressive. She knows exactly what’s going on. She is so attuned to other peoples’ energy that she just knows where you’re at. After working with her I have never felt more alive and aligned to my true self.

Andrew B, San Diego, CA, USA


Add A Comment