Ten Ways That Keeps Us From Awakening To Reality

Here follows a few of the most common hindrances to awakening to who we really are.

See if you can recognize yourself in some of the points I’m making and the questions asked and look within yourself to see how you can open up more to the suggestions that I mention. 

  • Are you constantly asking for guidance but not listening and following through with the guidance given?

There’s a lot of postponing going on on the spiritual path and many people often want easy answers and quick fixes.

Is this you? Do you ask and ask but never do what is suggested? Are you looking for the quick fix?

And does your ego get easily bruised and offended because the suggestion didn’t make you ‘feel good’?

Recognize that the postponing and avoidance of deeper spiritual work is all the ego resisting the process.

  • What I often see is that the suggestion to attend to stillness and nothing else is usually dismissed and people make lousy excuses such as “I can’t do it, I’m too restless”, “I don’t have time to meditate/just be right now”, “It’s difficult to relax”, “my mind won’t let me” and so forth.

Is this you? Recognize that stillness is the egos worst enemy. It really is.

It’s in the stillness we realize not only how the mind chatters away non-stop (most people think it’s ‘normal’ to have a mind that never relaxes), but also where we are in it so to speak. 

In stillness, there we are, and that’s where the ego is not and this is something we come to realize when getting on with it instead of not doing it ‘because my mind won’t let me‘. 

  • No one can teach you to awaken to the Truth of your being, it’s not a teaching but something you have to find out for yourself. (Not as in ‘figure out’, but as in realize/discover).

It requires self-inquiry and stillness. It’s not something that is added unto you. Actually the opposite happens, and it’s none of your doing. In this process you will lose your self. (The little self, the image of who you think you are).

  • Are you giving your spiritual authority away by following someone (guru etc), believing what they say?

As long as you only ‘believe’, you will stay on a conceptual level. In the awakening process the only thing that will ever do, is direct experience. Nothing else.

How about not following anyone for a few days, to not read any books or listen to any teachings, to see how it feels? Do you feel disoriented, confused and helpless without your guru/teacher nearby?

All dependency is unhealthy, it’s a kind of an addiction. 

You can’t be alone with yourself for a few days without getting antsy and agitated? That’s the same thing as with stillness. The ego can’t stand it.

It needs something or someone to entertain and cuddle with it.

  • Are you deceiving yourself somehow?

Are you refusing to see the truth of a situation, person or even yourself? What do you know that you really don’t want to know? How are you not being true to yourself?

Do you really listen to what your heart is telling you? (To really listen means to also follow through on what is received in terms of guidance). 

How are you listening to yourself? When meditating on things, are you trying to figure things out, or are you simply listening without trying to listen?

There’s a vast difference there. You can listen with your heart, or you can listen with your mind.

The heart is open and receptive, while the mind is grasping and seeking. Let go of all trying and simply listen.

  • Are you always doing something? Learning new techniques, obsessed with self improvement and so forth?

Are you somehow repressing the darkness in you, thinking it’s not spiritual? (Or ‘evolved’).

Believe me, on this path there will be periods where you feel resentment and arrogance, and you will also be judgmental, which is the most shunned word in the spiritual arena as far as I have seen.

But you will experience those things. (Almost guaranteed).

It’s all part of the awakening process, and that’s how we mature; we have to allow ourselves to be “immature” too and not pretend that we are more evolved than we are. 

It is necessary to feel those things (whatever they may be for you personally) in order to break free. 

We need the friction, but what many do is that they make the feelings wrong and they try to be someone they are not, like someone loving and compassionate and grateful and so forth. (=“Spiritually evolved”).

There will be times when you are not so “spiritual”, trust me on that one 🙂

We learn that that too (the concept of spirituality) also is something that will fall away from us.

It’s all a part of the process and what happens is that you move through them (the emotions and processes), and then on the other side (when things has settled down and integration has taken place) you will naturally move into being a more compassionate and loving person.

Not by trying to be, it’s simply what happens naturally as we mature in the realization of our true nature.

  • Do you keep separating your spiritual life and ordinary everyday life? As if it was two different things? Like something you can ‘do’ on the weekends, or when time permits?

In reality, what’s in front of us is always the perfect teacher, it can be your rampant and impossible-to-control teenager, it can be your condescending boss, or the driver that just took your parking space while knowing you were there first.

Spirituality is not only about navel gazing, lit candles, incense and walks in the woods. It’s about what’s in front of you right now and how you chose to deal with it.

  • Do you keep questioning and doubting your natural impulses and instincts?

Are you (again) seeking answers and quick fixes from others instead of going within to ask yourself what is true and real?

Are you over-analyzing everything to pieces, trying to make sense of things that might just be random happenings?

Not everything has to mean something, but the ego wants to know the reason and purpose to everything in order to have a sense of control. 

  • Are you stuck in past ways of thinking (holding on to beliefs and concepts, refusing to see things from other perspectives), or past stories of victim hood?

Or are you too occupied on doing, doing, doing, so that you can get that thing you desire to have in your possession some day in the future?

Do you waste your time and energy on mindless things such as surfing the net or watching TV for hours and hours, not actually doing anything constructive? 

You’re not living life. You’re missing the whole point of living.

It’s Now, and you’re wasting it on crap.

Trying to get away from the present moment, hiding from life by denying your true feelings, or shunning away from what can be challenging (such as being alone with yourself in stillness), are all hindering you from living life fully.

Darkness and light are interdependent of each other and we would not realize the one without the other and to always try to avoid or get rid of the darkness in you you never get to realize the true light, which is who you really are.

Thinking that ‘maybe if I balance my chakras, or write a gratitude-list of all the positive things about my asshole of a boss, or if I force a smile even if I feel resentful’ is not helpful at all.

Those things are all about avoidance and being deceitful to yourself and will not lead to any kind of true transformation at all.

For a while the ego can feel a boost and feel in control and so forth, but it’s only temporarily.

All things has to be faced and looked at on this path.

The biggest ego-trip there is is to try to get rid of the ego, and the only way to any kind of true liberation is to have a sincere and deep look at who the one is that tries to improve itself, make itself more spiritual, purify itself and so on.

Who is that?

  • Do you ever look deeply into who you really are? I mean in the most dedicated way?

Sometimes people even say that they know it’s their ego, being “okay” with that (or feeling hopelessness as if they can’t do anything about it) without any interest of looking deeper! (They feel defeated before they have even began to look). 

I know it’s the ego”, but who is it that sees that?

Don’t keep yourself on the surface only, go deeper.

Don’t be afraid of the void and emptiness. At some point you will encounter that, and that’s the threshold. 

Don’t be one of those that found it too difficult so they turned away from the threshold to Truth and went back to the old ways of living and being.

Be with yourself, the deeper self, in stillness.

That’s where Truth meets itself.


(Pic from one of my walks the other day. Snow at last:)

A few other articles that you might like:

Who Do You Think You Are, Ego?

Laugh The Seriousness Off! (Ego takes itself to be so important)

Don’t Make The Mind Into An Enemy

7 Ways Of How We Dull Ourselves Down Spiritually And What To Do About It

Submit topic requests and questions here.

Transformational coaching

Everything you want is in the flow

Leave struggle and feeling frustrated and stuck behind you and start moving through life feeling ALIVE in a magical flow with a deep sense of connectedness, absolute trust and inner calm and confidence.

When you get in alignment you will have every area of your life completely change and transform for the better.

Life has a magical way of clicking into place once you get in alignment with it.


OPTIONS: Single sessions via Skype or in person, or a package of 4 sessions for even greater progress and deeper growth.

I can’t put into words how much you have helped me

I couldn’t have kept it all together had I not experienced a PROFOUND shift during and after my session with you.

Maria Erving membership site


  1. Pingback: 3 Things To Surrender That Will Give You Peace · Maria Erving

Add A Comment