The Trial is the Initiation to Truth
If you had to make a choice; which one of your six senses would you let go of last?
Think about it. What would you want to keep the most?
If you say “intuition”, which I think most of us would chose, then why do so few of us actually honor it?
If we are willing to let go of sight and hearing before our inner knowing and guide through life (intuition), then how come so many people are not listening to it?
Why is there so little respect?
There is no such thing as “higher knowing” because that would imply that there’s something called “lower knowing” – that is not true.
There’s either knowing or there’s self-deception.
That’s very simple and clear. No need to make it more complicated.
If you have ever found yourself tossing and turning in bed at night, wrestling with either a decision that you have made that you now know was not the most wise thing to decide, or if you are about to make a decision and you’re unsure what to do, be very sure of one thing;
You know something that you don’t want to know. You are either deceiving yourself or about to deceive yourself.
You are somehow dishonoring your inner knowing, and you know it.
Here’s where the emotional turmoil and discussions you have with yourself comes in very strongly.
Oh, yes! We all know of those don’t we, in some form or another.
How we try to convince ourselves that it’s not really that big of a deal.
“What consequences can there possibly be?”
“I have already promised him/her/them”.
“Okay, so maybe there’s some consequences but I can live with them”.
“I know he’s a jerk/she’s a drama queen, but I’m sure he/she can be nice too. Besides, he’s/she’s under a lot of stress now”.
(Do not be fooled; stressful situations reveal peoples real character).
He (or she) might be a jerk etc, but that’s not the Truth.
That’s an opinion (his mom might still think he’s an angel of a man, or her boss might think she’s the best), but it’s also something that the Truth within you has taken note of and is now informing you, through your intuition, that you should stay away from that person or a situation.
That’s what must be trusted. Not your opinions and reasoning about the person or situation.
That’s the ego talking, and the super ego (the parent/authority voice within you) that tries to convince you that you’re not reasonable and so on and it will present you with reasons and explanations on why you should go with that person/situation anyway.
Remember this: Life will always get its way.
You might go ahead and marry that jerk (that is “nice most of the time”) for example and then live in resentment and so on until you one day have had it and divorce is a reality. (Or worse).
When you could have avoided all that by simply going with your inner knowing right away and not have made excuses for someone.
This happens when we’re afraid of fear and embarrassment.
Maybe you have made a promise to someone that now expects you to help them with something for example and you feel day by day a stronger intuitive feeling that “no, this is not a good idea after all”, but you’re not following through with some kind of action on the knowing.
If you have a strong intuition already, you recognize how the process unfolds by the inner turmoil you feel.
This is when you start to feel very strongly that you should tell the other person that you can’t go through with your promise after all, but you hesitate, you try to talk yourself into some kind of reasoning and so forth, but you still know, don’t you?
You definitely know.
But you’re afraid of embarrassment; what will they think of you, what if they take it the wrong way, what if I can be hurt somehow, what if they.. what if, what if..
The thing is, that it might have nothing whatsoever to do with them at all.
Maybe the path is just not right for you, but you don’t know why, you just know you should turn around from whatever path you have embarked on now that you feel the inclination to steer in a different direction, and then if the people you are about to broke your promise to is not respecting your choice to change your mind, then why would you want to have them in your life in the first place?
I can say that one thing I really respect with people is when they have the guts to follow what is true for them, even if it meant that they would come to me and say “hey, you know that thing I promised to help you with? Yeah, about that, .. My intuition is telling me that it might not be a great idea after all”, I would absolutely respect that and have no hard feelings at all.
I know that the heart knows best for all of us so I would actually feel even more respect for them and trust them even more.
I don’t even have to know why they changed their mind, because one other thing I know is that intuition almost never explains itself.
We just get the message to do this and not that, and that’s pretty much it.
Maybe that’s why so many people are not following through on their inner knowing, because of the fact that one can never know where the following of that will lead.
There’s no control.
I know that the trail and testing one encounters can be really tough, and there can be fear and uncertainty (how will others react and take it, how we then would respond, if we have to defend/explain ourselves etc etc, not to mention all the ‘what ifs’), but once we follow through, that’s when Truth makes itself known, and this is a huge relief and there’s tremendous gratitude and freedom in following that.
You thank your intuitive knowing for being so strong and for not giving up on you.
You can even feel gratitude for those sleepless nights when you were tossing and turning in bed, and you feels such gratitude towards yourself for having had the trust in yourself that you had (and have).
And then the new choice you make feels like the most obvious thing, once you have taken the step.
There can still be remnants of fear lingering, but you know where it comes from; the conditioned mind. (So it means nothing).
And the fears probably involves something that you are phenomenal in scaring yourself with.
You know what that fear is, it has been used so many times before by the ego to hold you in small place within yourself.
Now you can see that so clearly and it no longer scares you.
All the reasoning and discussing with yourself you did only a short while ago to justify your self-deception is laughable now.
And this revelation is what makes the next intuitive knowing so much easier to follow because you know the reward of being true to yourself.
You might still go over things in your mind, you might still want to hear what your friends think about whatever it is you’re wrestling with, but in the end it will be your own heart that wins. (“Mistakes” might still be made, but if so, at least they will be honest).
There need not be suffering.
The fear that is felt in the moment, or the momentary embarrassment of going against the conventional or whatever, is nothing compared with the suffering and unhappiness it brings to not listen to your own inner knowing.
Rip the band-aid off! The fear or pain is brief!
Call off the wedding, break up an unhealthy relationship, break a promise, do that thing that scares you, whatever it is.
Or, go on, deceive yourself.
There’s no other choice but between those two things always. In any moment of agony and turmoil of the emotional kind, ask yourself where your not being totally truthful with yourself.
We already know.
And we also have the right to change our minds and hearts at any time and make a new choice that comes from a honest place with our hearts.
The pain or hurt is only temporary as long as you follow through, while the other pain or hurt can go on for decades until the day comes when you are forced to make the decision that your intuition already informed you about to do from the beginning.
Stand firm in your promise to yourself, that no matter what “I will be true to myself”.
Dare to trust yourself. That’s the real trial and test.
Not the situation, but how much you are willing to trust your own inner truth.
Then from that trust and from honoring yourself, that which is real and true naturally unfolds.
And it gets more and more easy and obvious to just go with heart right away, and the more you do it, the more clear the guidance gets, and following it is what Flow is about.
That’s the natural flow of life righ there.
More posts about intuition can be found here: