The Truth will set you free – Don’t Give Up!
“I saw your writing about ego death and I am going through it now, but what do you do when you have anxiety and obsessive thought disorder? The negative compulsions and negative thoughts that repeat over and over makes it a lot harder to surrender.”
Thank you for your question.
I can’t really say much about your disorder (I’m not a doctor) but what I can share with you is what I know to be true and that has helped me, and not only me, but people I’m in contact with and former clients of mine.
Nothing is incurable – and nothing is permanent except for the Truth; it never changes.
Sometimes people think that the disorder they have is something that they are stuck with for life, and that’s just not true.
One time someone even told me that they were afraid that if they lost their disorder (which was similar to yours, they were bipolar) they would loose their creativity, as if it was the disorder that gave them their creativity! (So they decided to not become free from it.)
We are not meant to have disorders of any kind – everything can be healed and restored.
Listen, I’m really speaking from experience.
I have participated in healing people (I do healing work) from so called chronic diseases such as Hepatitis for example where the doctors were stunned over how the total (100%) healing could happen because according to their knowledge the disease is incurable.
But we were dealing with Truth, not facts, not knowledge but infinite wisdom, and that wisdom, that power, lives within each and everyone of us.
I have been healed too, so I know what I’m talking about.
I have been through years of rehabilitation from drug addiction so I know all about having to live with anxiety, depression, compulsiveness (addictive behavior), and I can also tell you that because I refused to listen to the doctors reports and “knowledge”, I was able to become healed from all of it.
They told me that I had to be on medication for the rest of my life because my brain was so damaged because of my drug abuse that I could never again be happy naturally; meaning I would have to, for the rest of my life, depend on medications to help create chemicals in my brain that allowed me to feel happiness.
I said No.
“I am going to heal myself – I am going to be restored – I am going to be free from ALL addictions, and I am going to be happy without medications!”
It didn’t matter what they said; I was determined to become free.
And you can have that determination too!
You are not bound to your disorder, whatever it might be, and this goes for everyone that ever reads this article; we are all meant to be FREE in every aspect and area of life.
So, with that said, and I hope it encouraged you to take back your power and not let your disorder control you or have you in its grip because you can become free, just like I was set free, and just like many have before me has and many will after me.
You can actually right now be walking in your testimony.
You might one day be able to share your testimony of how you freed yourself from what others told you you couldn’t be freed from (if people have told you things like that) and your testimony could potentially inspire and influence countless of people all over the world – who says it can’t?
It could absolutely be so that you are walking in your testimony right now.
Now, lets look at the practical aspect of your question.
You wrote; “.. negative thoughts that repeat over and over makes it a lot harder to surrender.”
Okay, and let me ask you this; what’s the alternative?
Are you going to cave in just because it’s “hard”?
Do you think it was easy for me to recover and heal myself? That it was easy to surrender to the process?
No, it took time. It took dedication, it took courage, it took a lot of hard work.
This is not easy for any of us, no matter if we’re in the process of awakening with or without diseases and disorders – it’s “hard” for everyone.
The process of spiritual awakening is not easy for anyone.
This is not a path for the faint-hearted.
You need to make a choice, and you need to become 100% dedicated, that’s why I asked you to look at what your alternative is.
You can let your disorder control you just because it’s hard, and if you choose that then let it control you and stay in bondage, but you can also choose to be determined to see yourself grow through this phase in your life, and if you do, the victory is yours.
What will it be?
When we really look at what our alternatives and options are, then we also see how ridiculous it is to go back and forth wondering how it will be.
Here’s two questions that you can apply to any situation in life that will help you shed some light on what way you decide to go:
Decide to win over this and you will.
Decide that you are going to live your true life and then let life take you fully on the path that is destined for you.
This is what you should surrender to right now – forget about surrendering the ego and all that.
For now; surrender to Truth and let it have its way with you.
Don’t waver. Be dedicated and you will come to see and experience the true life that you are suppose to live.
Don’t even consider failure.
You will overcome this if you don’t let yourself be overtaken by the difficult and challenging process that you’re going through right now.
Besides, Truth is not going to let go of you once it has a hold on you, so you might as well go with it voluntarily 🙂
After you have decided to go with it you might ask “What now”?
Be fierce about your own awakening and freedom – the renewing of your mind.
This involves inner work, a relentless dedication to know the Truth that sets you free.
We all have 1440 minutes in a day, seven days a week, so the first thing I suggest you do is to see to it that you prioritize your time well and that you invest your time in feeding your mind, soul, and spirit with Truth, with inspiration, with wisdom, with deeper understanding.
Become very selective with how you use your time and energy.
The ego procrastinates and makes excuses; if it’s not this (whatever condition you’re in) then it’s always something else; that you live in the wrong place, you don’t have money, you’re not this or that, it always has something to say that prevents you from taking action.
One thing that everyone can do is to meditate (daily), it doesn’t cost a thing.
This is the number one thing I recommend anyone to do, in whatever situation they found themselves in, and if your mind is rampant and you’re not able to meditate at first, then there’s brainwave and binaural beats meditations that can help your brain to get into a meditative state quickly.
Kelly Howell’s guided meditations is something I recommend you look into if you find it difficult to calm your mind and thoughts:
My main point is; invest in yourself, learn, grow, develop, evolve; and even get a coach or mentor that can be with you for a longer period of time and who can support you in your awakening process, who can guide you through all the different transformational processes one goes through.
More about sessions with me here: mariaerving.com/sessions
Feed your mind with Truth!
Let the Truth be dominating your mind; let it saturate your mind, use every possible moment to renew your mind so that it becomes aligned with the Truth of who you are.
We are all suppose to have a sound mind!
“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind” – 2 Timothy 1:7
Do not allow despair or any kind of disorders to rob you of the wonderful future God has for you.
Again, what you’re going through right now might very well be something that will help encourage others later on when you have overcome this phase of your life yourself, so don’t back out from this process, don’t let your mind tell you how difficult things are or talk you out of your awakening, instead allow yourself to surrender to the process.
It’s difficult for everyone, not just people with disorders, and ego death is a dying-process; you are dying to your old self to be born again as your true self so it’s not a comfortable or easy process, but the rewards are great once you come through it.
Don’t let your ego mind win. It will always tell you things that are not true.
Get really invested in your own well-being and liberation; read holy scriptures and inspirational and empowering books, learn about how other people have overcome what you’re struggling with, listen to audios, get the messages of Truth planted in your mind and heart and then when that starts to take over, then your true self will begin to shine forth from within and the Truth that has set you free will be expressed in every aspect and area of your life.
I would suggest to you that you do this right now;
Stand in front of your mirror, and say to yourself;
“You can either allow your disorder to order you around, to tell you that it’s harder or maybe even impossible for you to surrender to your awakening because of it, or you can decide to take your power back. You can decide to have your freedom, your liberation, your true life. Which is it? What are you going to choose?”
The power that is within you is greater than any of the distresses and challenges that we encounter in life – it’s bigger than any of that!
That’s what we are to surrender to – so It can take over our life and make it right again, so It can put us right back on track again with our true life that we came here to live – Free from disorders and free from the bondage of the ego mind.
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