What do you want in a partner?
I have a personal thing to share with you when it comes to attracting a partner into ones life, and the message that I want to share with it is basically very simple; know what you want, and stay true to yourself.
But what if you know that what you want is not what most people want?
I’m single and I like being single to be honest, and at the same time I’m open to meet The One.
I’m not out there looking for him, but I have made a list of my preferences in a man so that I will recognize him when we meet:-)
One of my life-choices that I have made a long time ago is that I do not want kids, and I’m absolutely 100% sure of this.
It has never been a dream of mine to be a mother.
When I meet someone I feel I kind of like, and that I want to get to know better, there comes a time in the evolvement of the relationship that one begins to talk about thoughts of future, values and dreams etc to see if we have the same values etc.
And when you get there, I strongly advice you to blurt it all out, I mean everything.
I have learned that it is best to do it as soon as possible, so that you don’t waste each others time and energy.
And besides, the deeper one goes into a relationship without even vaguely mention what you see for yourself in the future, the harder it can get to back away from it when you realize that you might not want the same things at all.
And while at the same time you might have developed some pretty strong feelings about this person it might be even harder to not go further with it..
Don’t hope or wish that the other person will “come around” later.
I mean; would you..? If you have made a very clear decision about something as big as not having kids?
It’s not something at least I could be flexible about if you know what I mean 🙂
Write a list of what you would want in a partner and a shared life together. Begin with at least 20 things.
The more the better!
I think I have around 130 things on my list. One of them is that I prefer him to be more outgoing, because I’m not particularly so.
And I can’t see myself and the man I’m with cocooning like two owls somewhere forever, it would bore me to tears 🙂
Another one is that I want him to be spiritual, in touch with himself as a Spirit, smoke-free, healthy etc etc.
Your list can be about anything that you think is important. If looks is important; then describe how your ideal partner looks. What kind of personality do you prefer..? and so on.
Write all your preferences down, and then stay true to yourself.
Simple rule, but perhaps not a very easy one.
Although very liberating and empowering when you know what you want, what you are really looking for in a love relationship.
If it’s really important for you to have honesty in a relationship, and he lies to you early on, then you will know that he’s not for you.
If laughing a lot and having fun is important to you and you meet someone who is complaining a lot or being kind of grumpy, well, do I need to say more..?
Make a list now 🙂