Ever Wondered Why God Failed You?
Ever Wondered Why God Failed You?
Have you ever gone through something difficult in your life where you asked God for help where he then failed to help you?
Millions of people all over the world continues to experience that God is not helping them, that their prayers are not answered and when they need their God the most, he’s not there for them.
This happens because their God does not exist; they are praying to something ‘out there’ while God is not a person, ‘he’ is a power, and that power resides within each and everyone of us.
We can know this conceptually and we can know this by direct experience where we know that we know that we know.. that we are God, but that doesn’t mean that we will never fall back to duality again, because believe me, it’s possible.
I have done it myself.
As you know about my challenging times right now, you may also have noticed that I have referred to the Bible more than usual recently and I have also shared about the deepening of my awakening a little bit in this article:
Many things has come to my realization since then when I recognized my own fall-back to duality in my crisis.
Some years ago when I realized my oneness with God and where all concepts fell away from my mind and consciousness I also realized that everything is an expression of myself; everything is an aspect of my own self, of my divinity.
Now in my crisis I opened myself up to the possibility that I might have got it all wrong (a crisis opens us up to all kinds of possibilities as we seek answers and solutions) and so I said to the power that runs this Universe that if Angels do exist after all, then I was open to be wrong and see reality for what it really is.
I think a crisis does that to a person, plus I’m all about knowing and living the Truth so when something is not in alignment with what I perceive as the Truth then I want to be corrected, I want to know what is true in reality because I’m not interested in living my life based on beliefs – I want the Truth and nothing but the Truth.
In times of crisis we either close ourselves to life by becoming fearful and worried (or resentful etc), or we open ourselves up by sincerely saying things like “hey, I might have got it all wrong, I’m open to that possibility, and if I am wrong, then I want to corrected” and so I kind of invited the Angels into my life again and with that came the concept of God as well. (In a very subtle way.)
I created a separateness between myself and God and in my human weakness I gave my power away to that – because I wanted to believe.
I wanted to believe that I could ask the Angels to help me, I wanted to believe that God would help me keep my home and so on.
And I did believe that. I was convinced that the help I needed would come.
So this has of course opened up a lot of other questions as well and also new revelations for me when it comes to our beliefs and expectations and so on and with that a lot of teachings that I was into just recently has also fallen away and I have outgrown them.
I had a lot of very powerful and profound spiritual experiences during this period where I needed a miracle to save me basically and I did a lot of inner work as well, a lot of praying, meditation and so on.
Some day I will share all the crazy and weird things I did (some of it really funny!) – but to put it in a few words; “I did it all”, every type of (spiritual) thing you can imagine a person would do who finds themselves in a really difficult time.
So when my prayers were not answered, when the miracles didn’t happen and when the help didn’t arrive and I lost my home due to my financial challenges, I obviously started to question this whole thing.
I wondered what happened – I was surprised and, .. not ‘disappointed’, but I wondered what went wrong so to speak.
I was like “what’s going on?” where I had “I really, really believed in you God, why did you fail me?”-type of thoughts.
Not that I think that something is “wrong”-wrong, but you all know what I mean.
So I asked myself some really deep questions, I did some self-inquiry and meditated on it all and realized that in my attempt to save myself (with the help of God), I had fallen back to duality and I had started to project my power wrongly – I once again created a God (and Angels) as if they were not within my own Self.
So I gave my power away to ‘idols’; I created them and thus made myself less powerful.
And as I did that the old (ego) structure came ‘alive’ where my relationship with God again became dualistic.
Ha! What a revelation it was for me and how funny we human beings are! 😀
It’s so easy to fall back to duality especially when you’re going through a crisis or when you’re in a huge life-change of some kind; like for example when people go through a divorce or when you’re recovering from addictions and so on.
There’s always the risk of going back to the old ways (because everything exists in consciousness and it exists there always) and sometimes that can happen in a very subtle way like it did with me in this particular process.
I just turned to the wrong God (the conceptual God) for help, and to Angels that I had created in my mind, thinking they would help me even though I had realized that there are no Angels ‘out there’ some years ago, that they are all inside of my own consciousness as an aspect of my own divinity.
Still I went back – and I did it because I needed a miracle and that lead me to open myself up to the possibility that I might have misunderstood everything and I wanted to remain open to the possibility that I had got it all wrong (I was willing to be wrong), which I think is a healthy way of looking at things.
The same thing happened to me when I moved to Spain, if you remember how I got my own apartment? (And I got divine help then.)
Here’s what happened: Update From Nerja
In short; I was desperate for a solution and in that desperation I opened myself up to the possibility that I could be wrong, that maybe there is a God (I was an atheist at that time), and so I asked for help and within hours I was helped and I found myself sitting in my own apartment (which I absolutely loved).
So I expected the same kind of help now too, because I had done all I could do on my own.
So when my situation got worse and worse and when I no longer could do anything myself I trusted God to help me, I trusted that things would turn out fine and I absolutely expected that a solution and answer would come up for me, but nothing happened.
So I was very surprised, and I also began to ask God what had happened, why I lost my home even though I believed that God would help me.
This is when I realized that omg, I have created a God, a God ‘out there’, who I thought would help me; I realized that I had made God almost into a person, I was talking to a God and not the God (power) within me.
And so I gave my power away to this “God”, like the majority of humanity does and who never get their prayers answered.
Fortunately for me I can laugh at my own mistakes and I am quick to correct myself too, so I don’t feel bad about anything (that’s a waste of time).
On the contrary this experience has taught me some very important lessons and it has also helped deepen my awakening and I’m even more aware and clear about how we as humans create a God ‘out there’ especially when we are in need of supernatural help.
Now, with all this said – and I share these things with you because I love exposing the ego, and I don’t mind being transparent in my own journey and unfoldment because I think it serves us all to be open and authentic in life;
What I have shared so far does not mean that I think things are ‘wrong’ in my life or that I’m in the ‘wrong place’ or anything like that.
I would prefer to have my own place and my financial independence in place (but I don’t make my situation into something “wrong”), and this has all made me realize many valuable things about myself and that’s what a crisis is suppose to do.
We are meant to grow through them.
For example, this has all helped me point myself back to God, or Truth, meaning the power that is within my very own Self, and it has become more firmly established in me now.
And it wasn’t like I actually believed in a God ‘out there’, but that was how it played out for me, so while I at the same time thought that ‘whatever happens is the will of God’ (after I had done all that I could do), I also thought that it’s not my reputation that is at stake here; it’s God’s.
And all the questions I came to ask myself in this process has been really helpful to me and I have had many revelations lately that has helped me clean out even more of the old false ideas that I carried in the past, so I know that this can never again disturb me.
Now I know that I know that I know and I know in an even deeper way than I did before.
There’s layers in oneness as well, even if it’s absolute the realization has many levels of understanding.
So many things has changed for me personally now thanks to this experience (I’m transformed by it) – and I’m very glad it did; I’m in a much better place within myself now where I feel empowered by all this.
I have taken my power back, and this has also inspired me to bring up the concept of God in my next Teleclass where I will be speaking about that and also where I will invite you to challenge your own beliefs and ideas about God.
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This weeks Teleclass will be on Friday (same time) instead of Thursday because it’s my birthday and I have other plans at that time.