How Can I Remain In Peace? (Ask Maria)
“In deep meditation I surrender everything and there is nothing, no sense of body, no image, no me, no thoughts… nothing but only stillness… and vastness and the feeling of relaxation is there.
The feeling remains after the meditation also say for 24 hours but whenever I start my daily work ( job etc.) the feeling (of peace, vastness etc) goes thinner and after some time I perceive myself as previous limited one.
How can I remain longer in that state and still do my daily work?”.
My Reply:
It’s just a state of mind (the state of meditation), it has to do with brainwaves and in waking consciousness when we do our work and so on we need to be in a different state than when we sleep for example.
Here’s an old article by me where I explain the different states of mind (brain states): mariaerving.com/meditation-and-brainwaves
The brain functions differently depending on what we do, so for example in your work you would need to be alert, or focused, and you can’t drive your car when being in a meditative state!
That would not be very smart 🙂
So what I would say to you is this:
Peace Is Always Here
Peace only goes away, or it appears to go away (in reality it never does, it’s always here) because you somehow start letting thoughts interfere with the peace.
By thoughts emotions and feelings are created and if you’re anxious or tense or whatever (=”not peaceful anymore”) you probably have a story to tell about the present moment that you have somehow made ‘bad’ or ‘wrong’.
Like for example that you’re not peaceful anymore; “I should be peaceful” is a form of resistance to ‘what is’.
So when you feel the “feeling of peace go thinner” and you “go back to the limited one” (as you put it), here’s what I’d suggest you to do:
You need to look into the “limited one” instead of what most people do; they avoid it and try to run away from it by trying to reach meditative states and have experiences in meditation.
“The limited one” is your ego, but the one doing the meditation is also your ego and sometimes it uses meditation as a momentarily relief from itself and life.
As human beings we can’t function in just one state of mind 24/7, the brain doesn’t work that way, but you can absolutely be at peace 24/7, even in the midst of a crisis.
And when anger etc comes up too – this doesn’t mean you’re repressing any other feelings that might come up, but peace will always be there in the base of everything else.
How?
By waking up and not letting your ego run after what it thinks is liberation.
Who is the one that meditates?
Ask yourself that and ask very deeply. It’s not a mental exercise, it’s deep self-inquiry.
Truth is not a mind-state, it’s beyond all that, that is what you should be looking for (for Truth).
Not more experiences and shallow states of peace even if they feel profound, because that kind of peace always goes away the moment something disturbs the status quo.
Meditation can become an escape for the ego to get away from itself for a while.
It just uses meditation to get away from the present moment and then when the shallow type of peace disappears it tries to get it back, always looking for the next hit (escape).
The state you are in in meditation is just a state, an experience, it means nothing basically. It’s just an experience, that’s all.
“Vastness” and all, whatever you experience in meditation are just simply experiences and nothing more.
Pleasant, and maybe even mind-blowing experiences but still it’s all just an experience.
It’s healthy to meditate, it gives you many benefits, absolutely, but to use it in an attempt to run away from yourself or try to get something is not very constructive.
Look into who it is that wants the peace, gets the peace, looses the peace and who tries to get back the peace (or whatever it is that you’re looking for, vastness, stillness, whatever it is).
Find out who you are and you have lasting peace and not the kind of peace that comes and goes.
What Is The Thought That You Believe?
Whenever you feel “not peaceful” anymore look at the feeling that arises and ask yourself how much of it is focused on proving yourself right.
Thoughts leads to feelings and they insist on being right and that’s what creates turmoil or any other feeling you would say is ‘not peaceful’.
But when you don’t believe your thoughts the thoughts stop creating feelings and thus they stop taking your attention away from the present moment.
So any time you feel that peace if not there anymore, check with yourself what story you’re making up and you will see that the story is what creates the not-peacefulness that you’re experiencing.
Somehow the mind always seem to want make something wrong, something is not working the way you think it should, someone said something or looked at you weirdly and immediately the mind goes into making stories.
That’s how peace is “lost”.
Thoughts are believed and once believed they strengthen your beliefs and intensifies the whole emotional experience and the cycle goes on and on until the mind gets a break once in a while when meditating for example.
But this way the core issue is never dealt with, and the problem is always the ego.
Right now you’re reading this but you might also simultaneously be thinking about something else; something is going on in your mind right now, just notice it and then realize that in reality you’re just sitting there reading this!
That’s all that’s going on in your entire life right now; you sitting there reading this article and everything else is going on in your mind and nowhere else! 😀
There could be peace right here and now while you read this and when you stop reading this and decide to do something else if you just don’t buy into your thoughts by believing them.
You could walk in peace from this moment on to the next if you didn’t believe your thoughts.
So your job/daily work is not what takes away your peace, your thoughts are – or you believing in them, that’s what takes away your peace.
Asking questions like:
- “Can I know that this thought is true?”
- “Can the opposite be (or become, if it’s something you worry about) true as well?”
- “Could something completely different happen as well, is there a possibility for that?”
- “Do I really know that what my thoughts tell me will happen/is happening?
- “Are my thoughts really true?”
.. etc are helpful in order to detach yourself from the untruth of thoughts.
We don’t know what will happen even five minutes from now so whatever the mind comes up with you can safely disregard it.
It doesn’t know, it just wants to know and insists on knowing when in reality it has no clue and have never had a clue and will never have a clue.
It’s clueless but wants so desperately be “the one who knows” and to ‘be right’ 🙂
Besides, Truth never uses fear to guide you (unless it’s regarding a physical threat), it guides you through gut-feeling and intuition.
Ego is the storyteller, the exaggerator and the one who delights in you becoming fearful and worried. Remember this always.
So, find out who this “I” is that experiences the peace in meditation, looses it and wants it back, and then you will realize the peace that never goes anywhere.
When you know who you are not, that’s when you find out who you really are and with that comes peace.
♥♥♥
A few other articles that could be helpful to you as well:
mariaerving.com/no-problems-before-thinking-happened
mariaerving.com/endless-search-for-spiritual-highs-keeps-us-stuck-in-ego
mariaerving.com/spiritual-awakening-and-the-workplace
mariaerving.com/how-to-improve-the-length-of-stillness
Thanks for The post Maria!
Yes.. definitely I am used to engrossed in the thoughts while doing my daily work.. and after some time i found that there is no peace at all.
You mentioned it well in the post .. yes… “You could walk in peace from this moment on to the next if you didn’t believe your thoughts.”
Yes I have to ignore the thoughts.
Just came in the mind … that when I found the “real I” in me, shall i lost my feeling of humanness in spite of having my body, mind etc.?
Thanks & Regards,
Ganesh.
No, don’t ignore them – Look into them, and then when you have seen through them you will be able to disregard them as they come up, but not until then.
To ignore them is called suppression, it’s not about pretending that they are not there, but really looking into them, to dissect them and really see through the falseness of them.
I gave you several examples of how to do that (“is this thought real?”, “how can I know that this thought is true” etc etc).
Do the work.
Don’t jump over any of this, it’s the ego who wants to hurry through these things because it thinks there’s some kind of reward for it on the others side.
When you have seen through your thoughts and beliefs (and how they create emotional loops), that’s when you can disregard fear etc when it comes up – because then you have seen through the construct of them.
This is important. Don’t just brush your thoughts and feelings off thinking you can just ignore them, that’s not how it works, that kind of thing will never lead to anything good.
Regarding your question where you wrote “when I found the “real I” in me, shall i lost my feeling of humanness in spite of having my body, mind etc.?”
There is no “real you in you” etc – don’t even speculate about what you will do “when you find yourself” or whatever.
Your mind will never (ever!) get this/understand it and these types of questions will only have you go round in circles.
And I’m not sure what you meant by “shall I lost my feeling of humanness in spite of having this body, mind etc”.
Don’t speculate about what will happen when you wake up – Find out!
Then you will know, and then the you that does all these things will not be there anymore, so there’s no need for you to think about any of that or try to figure out anything about ‘what to do when..’.
So again, see if you can find the one who does all these things, who meditates, who wants to know all the things you have been asking, who it is who wants to wake up etc.
Here’s an article that is helpful to you:
https://mariaerving.com/who-am-i/
Here’s what I suggest you do:
When you feel that you’re loosing the peace, immediately stop what you’re doing and confront the fear or whatever it is that you’re feeling.
Take a pen and paper and ask yourself these things (see below) and write down whatever comes up.
And the more fear you feel about looking into something, the more determined you should be and really look (and write even if it’s challenging).
Because the fear indicates that there’s some deep-rooted stuff there that needs to be looked at.
So, write down your answers (everything that comes up):
– How am I making myself anxious/fearful/worried etc right now?
– What thoughts am I entertaining and believing in?
Write them down. Don’t just do this in your head.
“I think that… and that….. will happen” for example, and write down everything that comes up, not just one thing.
Go deep with this and be determined to see through the thoughts that creates turmoil in your life once and for all.
– And then ask yourself how thinking those thoughts make you feel.
And then when you have done this ask yourself if those thoughts can really be true (+ all the questions I mentioned in the article and in my previous comment).
Do this until you really see how it is your thoughts (you believing in them) that makes you suffer and nothing else.
That’s when you are able to become free from them.
Thanks Maria,
Thank You very much.
Regards,
Ganesh
You’re very welcome Ganesh, and feel free to share later on how things progress for you.
Thank you soo much Maria..!
I am writing this to express my sincere gratitude to you. Your advice and guidance has been invaluable. You are a great source of inspiration for me.
I have done everything you told (i.e. seen through the fearful thoughts…asking truthfulness of it…etc.)
In this process i found that while inspecting fearful thoughts.. the natural witnessing took birth in me and suddenly i found cool peaceful place inside me !!
the real cool, happy, peaceful place in my heart region for me !
I can operate from that place and felt big comfort. The choice is there!
the fearful thoughts are still coming but as you said, now they lost their power over me and after surrendering this new found place i am doing much better.
Thank you very much again Maria !
Now onwards I am resting this cool place frequently. My mind is also experiencing good rest. Thoughts are there. but I easily watch them. (which are not possible previously for me) and if i found relevant then only i take required action. Another thing i found that every thing ( this new cool place, witnessing.., comfort etc.) happens in my body only and I have to take real care of the body. ( Eating habits, ignorance etc.)
You know that last time when you was in India I really wanted to meet you personally. I don’t know whether it will happens or not! lol !!
Thanks & Regards,
Ganesh
Glad to hear you had a breakthrough Ganesh.
Do the work and the realizations come 🙂 There is no other way; no shortcuts available in this process. Great to hear you did what I suggested.
I believe you’d like these two articles as well, they are about intuition and the body:
https://mariaerving.com/barometer-for-truth/
https://mariaerving.com/how-to-listen-to-intuition/
Your intuition will show you the next step on your journey forward.
And since you feel something physical is happening right now (in terms of your body) it might be a good idea to listen extra attentively to your body and how it speaks to you.
Re: meeting in person, yes who knows what happens, although I won’t be coming to India anymore (unless I’m invited) but I’m here in Europe should you ever travel here 🙂
Another thing that I want to mention that is important is that once you have had this insight into how fear operates through thinking is that you have to do the things I suggested over and over again until you really see.
It’s not enough to just see this once and then be done with it (although it’s definitely a profound shift to have seen it), actually now that you have started to dig deeper there can be more deep-rooted fears that might come up.
And when they come up, as they many times do, don’t let it scare you away from continuing.
The ego uses fear, it’s one of its tactics to get you to stop doing deep spiritual work so keep that in mind and don’t let anything come in the way for you wanting the Truth and nothing else.
If/when fear comes up, look into them immediately and don’t let them intimidate you nor dominate you in any way or form.
Here’s an article that just came to mind that I know will be helpful to you:
https://mariaerving.com/how-do-you-keep-the-spiritual-insights-alive/
Yes Maria!
I am going to do that. Actually I am exploring now the mind, It’s constructs, Thought patterns, It’s compulsiveness, fear patterns… etc.
and also it’s usefulness !
I will keep you sharing all that. I feel great about this that you are there to guide me !
Thanks & Regards,
Ganesh
Very glad to be here for you Ganesh 🙂 Let me know if you have any questions about anything at all – and yes, do continue sharing, that is always welcomed.