I hope this article will show you how we, in order to change our life experience to something more desirable (if you feel stuck in a situation and it seems impossible to move forward for example), must change from within first, and then the outer will change as well.

Sometimes I come in contact with people who are just not willing to look at things differently and nothing can change in their lives until there has been an inner transformation. 

Thoughts come and go and we don’t control them, but we do have the ability to either accept and believe them to be true, or we can reject them and not believe them.

Read: We Don’t Have To Believe Every Thought

We can’t control what thoughts we will have five minutes from now (or where the thought we just thought came from), or decide now what to think next Thursday at noon – Just see if you can manage to control your thinking that way.

Thoughts only ever come and go, and what quality of life would that be to constantly trying to control thoughts? 

The same goes when someone reeeeally strains to only “think positively”, because if their inner being is not in agreement with the ‘positive thoughts’, then there’s always going to be an inner conflict. 

Anybody can see that that’s both crazy and pointless. 

And you’re not being true to yourself; you are actually lying to yourself and not honoring your true feelings so that’s not a healthy way to go about this at all. 

(Don’t merely try to rearrange the surface mind, that will amount to nothing of lasting value).   

Our emotional and mental life affects the quality of our life, and it also helps mold and form the direction our life will take, so in that regard we have the power to choose in which direction we want to go, but we should always be honest and truthful to ourselves.

This is not clear to everybody, so I was inspired to write this article today.

Some people have no clue over their ability to choose (they just go through life merely reacting to it, instead of responding) or they try really hard to control their thoughts, which of course only leads to frustration and failure.

Here’s a couple of posts that you might like:

How To Respond To Negativity From The Perspective of Spirit  

Defeat or Liberation; Your Call

Here follows some points on how to change your thoughts and thus change your life, and it’s not by control, but by consciously directed flow:

Change your attitude. When we change our attitude about what’s happening, the happening itself turns in the direction where our attention goes. The situation itself is always neutral, it’s our opinions about it that determines how we experience it.

Listen to your inner speech. What are you saying to yourself? How are you talking yourself in and out of things? Just to become aware of the quality of your inner speech/thoughts can be a huge revelation.

Change perspective. Play around with this. See a situation from different angles and question yourself if you’re fixed on one viewpoint only and ask yourself how you can know that your current perspective is ‘the right one’.

Questioning our assumptions allows more doors and windows in our mind to be opened. Let some fresh air in!

Notice what you say. The words we use are in our control to choose. And the words we choose to use also forms how we think (and behave). We can chose to say words that builds us (or others) up, or we can use words that are hurtful. 

The more aware we become of the words we use when we speak, the more we learn to be kind and compassionate, both to ourselves and others.

Question your beliefs. How do you know they are true? Just have a closer look at them and see how no beliefs in essence are true. They are only beliefs and beliefs come from an ingrained thinking-pattern. (Habitual thoughts).

Use your ability to accept or reject. We don’t have to believe every thought that tries to hook us.

Stop and take a look at the hook itself. If it makes you suffer then you have accepted a fearful thought to be true.

Ask what fear has ever done for you and why you give it so much credibility.

What has fear ever given you but suffering and why do you trust in it more than you trust and believe in your own true being?

Become aware of where you chose to have your attention. That way we can direct our thinking in the direction we actually want to go.

If you’re attention is on gloom and doom, then that’s the path you will find yourself on (and you get more gloom and doom to complain about), and if you keep your focus on what matters the most to you then more and more clarity and guidance will be given to you when you go down that path. (And you will enjoy the ride).

Our thoughts don’t create reality per se, but they do help create our experience of it. 

It’s what we accept and permit to run the course, and that is entirely in our hands, so have a look at what thoughts you’re entertaining because the nature of our thoughts is something that we definitely can choose. 

By becoming more conscious and aware of that we are able to shift and mold our thinking in a direction that enhances the quality of our life experience, and notice how the situation itself didn’t have to change.

The situation might still be a challenging or difficult one but our minds and hearts has opened to it and there’s a relaxed state of mind and that in turn promotes all kinds of answers and solutions to come forth that thinking itself (the conscious/thinking mind) could never have come up with!

Start asking more questions. Many people voice their opinions and bemoan their life experience and are very vocal about it, but it’s much more constructive to ask (yourself) questions that will help open up your mind and thinking process towards solutions.

You can start by becoming aware of your reactions and thinking processes by asking these simple questions repeatedly: (Until the new way of thinking process becomes natural).

Does this bring be discord or harmony? Does this enhance the quality of my life of does it take away from it?

And sense intuitively where you’re headed and choose to go with the path that brings harmony and peace.

Other things that helps shape our thinking is what we let into our minds and what/who we choose to surround ourselves with, such as media (advertising, “news”, etc), the friends we keep (we all influence each other), the conversations we have and so on, so be selective and only let the very best into your life.