When you follow your gut there will come periods where your integrity and dedication will be tested, and this might sound as if it has nothing to do with awakening, but it has actually a lot to do with awakening.

There will be tests along the way and they will usually come your way multiple times one after one another for a period of time, and what I have learned is that those tests are there not only for your own inner growth and experience, but it’s also there as a light to clarify for you who you can trust and it also becomes more and more clear to you how programmed the world is to follow money and false security rather than their instincts.

People will cheer you on if you tell them that you’ll take a job just to survive, ‘good for you’ they say, but when you say ‘no, my gut says no, so I’m not taking that job’ they will look down upon you and think you’re crazy for not taking the job, even if it’s clearly a job that is draining and not for your best interest.

‘Hey, it’s all about the money’ they say. That’s how the majority of the world population live their lives, but that’s not how I live my life.

What you’re met with when you follow your gut instincts if your apparent (the minds interpretation of what it sees and imagines) life circumstances indicates that you should definitely take that job because it gives you money (even if it makes you cringe inside), is:

1. The very unconscious people can get irritated and annoyed and say that you’re foolish to follow your heart, they can even ridicule you and laugh at you for ‘being childish’.
2. The people who have some connection to their intuition but dare not to follow it, they will usually become silent and change the subject altogether and not respond to what you just said.

They know on a deep level the truth in what you expressed and shared with them (that you’re not going to take a job that feels wrong in your heart), and they also know on a deep level that there are things they do in their life ‘just to get money’ while at the same time they hear the inner voice that tries to guide them in a different direction (a dream or something they long to do) but they are too afraid to follow it.

These people usually kind of ‘likes’ when you fail. (And you will ‘fail’ many times before you ‘succeed’).

They like to put on a sad face and go ‘aww.. too bad it didn’t work out, huh.. ouch’

But for me, when something turns out to be a ‘mistake’, it’s not a mistake to me, it’s a lesson, and all those lessons just helps sharpen my intuition even more – and whatever ‘mistakes’ there is I can with integrity say that at least they are mine.

Many people (unconsciously most of the time) want you to remain small and they pretty much only encourage you when you act like they would have, meaning for example taking a job that sucks because that’s what they would have done.

Many people go through life only surviving and to me that’s not living, and as long as I’m not actually starving, I’m not going to take a job that makes me feel really bad inside.

I deal with what is right now, and not what my imaginations tells me.

I don’t know what happens tomorrow – but I make sure that whatever happens now is met with the truth in my heart.

Yesterday I was on a job interview and I felt all yucky when I left and knew that it wasn’t for me, the whole setting felt wrong and I would not want to spend my days serving alcoholics their poison (it was a restaurant but to me it was more like a shabby bar where the locals meet to drink everyday), that would be completely out of integrity, and my gut instinct told me to not take it but to trust that something that is in alignment will show up – but only if I follow my instincts!

That’s the key, but even if it’s natural and the most obvious thing for me to follow my intuition I still sometimes have doubts before I make a decision; ‘I really need the money’, ‘but it doesn’t feel right’, ‘yeah, but I need the money’, ‘yeah but..’ – we all have those doubts a times, especially when things are at a critical point and kind of tight.

It’s easier to go with the flow so to speak when nothing’s at stake. It’s when things are tough that your true character really shows. 

And then when you do make a choice that is against the grain people around you can get uncomfortable and that too can then influence you and strengthen your doubt, or it can make you stronger in your conviction that you indeed made the right choice.

It’s really about you and what you chose to listen to – yourself or the world.

If you tell them that you’re going to turn the job down because it doesn’t feel right some of the people around you might not be comfortable with that and so they change the subject or ignore what you just said, pretending they didn’t hear you.

But if you say ‘I’m gonna take this anyway because I need the money’, then you’ll probably met with encouragement and they will cheer you on.

To me that’s hilarious, and sad at the same time.

They are slaves.

They probably hate their jobs (and think everybody does and that only a few in this world are privileged to actually like what they do) and they are afraid to start moving in a different direction.

Sometimes you get comments like (actually, many people say this in various contexts, it’s like a human disease), ‘well, you have to survive’, or ‘it’s all about the money isn’t it’ and I’m like ‘no it’s not about that at all!’

But they don’t want to hear that and say something about having to survive and that following your heart doesn’t put food on the table.

Well, have you even given it a chance??

For me it has worked. I have had food on the table and somewhere to live, even if I for some time a few years ago lived in a trailer but I was so grateful and happy that thinking back still gets me all emotional because all my needs were met, every day.

I have had just enough, I know how it is to be poor and not being able to do anything else but buying the absolute necessities and nothing more.

And yes, at times it has really sucked because I couldn’t do what others could, not even doing something as normal as going to the movies, but I have always had what I needed.

There’s things I haven’t told you about my economy and how it has been.

But I have been taken care of (by life/the universe) and continue to be taken care of, which I am very grateful for.

If I didn’t follow my intuition I would go against life itself and I know that that would be the death of this path that I’m on.

I will not compromise my intuition and inspiration for anything. It has to feel right, otherwise I’m not doing it.

And fortunately for me, I’m not in a desperate situation just yet (hopefully things get better soon), but if I were, then I would still make choices that was rooted in integrity.

Lots has changed for me recently (inner transformation), and I feel the pull towards a new life direction and this might not be the best of times to change career path (I will always continue to write though, that’s not going to change) but that’s how life goes – you have to follow it or you will be miserable.

Just look at the world; the ones that are genuinely happy or content are those who are true to themselves.

There is no way I would not follow my heart – it’s so obvious to me, absolutely crystal clear to me, that following my intuition is the only way to go about life.

So that’s what I’ll do.

As I mentioned in the beginning of the article, the tests and trials we encounter usually comes in periods of maybe 3-4-5 tests in a row that will help you along the path that is right for you, but that can be challenging for someone who is not yet inclined to follow their gut.

For those not yet in touch with their truth it can be very challenging and they are filled with self-doubt, fear and dilemmas that keeps them up all night and so forth.

But as they dare to trust themselves the trust also shows them that it’s the only safe way to live because it will never lead anyone astray.

Even the apparent wrongs in life will feel ‘right’; like they are suppose to be the way they are, even if at times we go through difficult times as we all do.

Until the day comes when you succeed or find really great and true love or whatever, you will probably not have many that cheer you on as you go your own way and follow your own unique path, and then when you get the reward so to speak you will hear from the same people around you that maybe even frowned upon your choices, that they believed in you the whole time. (According to what I have read in biographies etc). 

So the path of following your heart can be challenging sometimes, but I can honestly say that for me that doesn’t matter – the love and life I feel running through me when I take steps outside my comfort zone and outside of what is conventionally believed to be the right thing, I feel the force of love/life so powerfully within me that sometimes I have a hard time to hold it together. 

Even now as I write this I’m bursting with inspiration and love, and I could just burst out in joyful tears.

Honestly, this is what I wish for everybody.

And even though the library is closed I have to somehow get this article published today! I’ll find a wifi somewhere at some restaurant closeby 🙂

So don’t turn away from your trials thinking you had it all wrong, and don’t let others get to you when they think you’re crazy or childish. Let them.

The reward for following what is true for you is so much more valuable than any of that other stuff.

Know that the trails will be there – but they are not to be afraid of, and they will usually come your way for a period of time and the faster you see them for what they are and the faster you make decisions from the gut, the more enjoyable the journey gets because the response from life or the universe is most of the time instant.

You know the bubbling feeling inside? That’s what it is about; that’s how life is in reality – life just seems right on – and it is.

And when the chains of trials are over for this time you’ll have made some tough choices, you have been courageous and bold, you have let go of things, situations and maybe even some peeps because you learned and realized who’s a friend and who’s not (who only supports you when you do as they would have done things), and most importantly: your integrity remained intact, and now a new phase in your life can begin afresh.

Another thing to mention now that I’m on it is that the chains of tests and trials will make some people judge you and think that ‘nothing is ever good enough for her’, ‘who does she think she is, she’s too picky, sometimes you just have to do something you don’t like, you can’t just do fun things in life’.

Truth is that I would rather clean peoples toilets instead of serving alcohol to people all day long at a shabby bar.

Cleaning toilets is not something I would consider as ‘fun’ but I would gladly do that if I had to because my integrity would be kept intact and that to me is most important.

So it’s not about doing only fun things.

I too also sometimes do things I don’t particularly enjoy doing, but some things in life just has to be done so I do them. It’s not about that.

That has nothing to do with following your heart.

Sometimes your gut tells you do something difficult too and so it has nothing to do with only choosing to do what feels good.

It has to do with what feels right, it’s about having integrity and being true to your own inner truth.

My own tests recently started out with the person I was living with when I first arrived Spain and the situation I was in and when I had to move my own place and my expenses suddenly went up a lot.

But now I have a lovely place to live and I hope I will be able to stay.

I focus on the fact that I am here right now. Right now I have paid the rent for the next month ahead and right now I have food on the table.

Then my cat got sick (he’s fine now) and I had to take him to the vet (multiple times because the first vet didn’t understand what was wrong with him even though I told him so I had to find another vet etc etc, long story), and with that came it’s own challenges of course, but again I followed what was true to me and it all ended well.

Then a person came into my life, and I had to check with my values and priorities and realized that I had not been true to them so I ended that relationship before it has really started.

Some other things happened as well but are of a more private matter I think so I leave them out for now.

And now this job thing with people around me kind of thinking I’m foolish (I feel that intuitively) to follow my heart instead of taking a job that would give me money.

But I won’t do something just for money unless it’s matter of life or death – and even then, I don’t know.. you know?

I have to ask myself; if this was my last day on earth; would I spend it in serving alcohol to people in a bar somewhere? My answer is, no, I wouldn’t.

And who knows, this might be my last day in this life (we can never know), so I rather spend it in looking for something that is life-affirming or meaningful in some way and that I can enjoy doing.

Back to the scrubbing toilets-thing I mentioned earlier; I would rather do that before something that is out of integrity. If I had to that is. Not that I want to scrub toilets, but you get my point.

And after all these tests recently (I feel I have moved through the period now as I feel so full of inspiration and awesomeness) I feel a new energy coming forth (something is brewing, I can feel it) and as always when we go with life (and not against our natural inclinations and instincts), life opens up to something new – but we have let go of that which no longer resonates or works for us before the new can come alive.

It’s so important to go with the instinct immediately when it comes to us and not wait even for one second.

It should be an instant response to just go with it – that way life opens up more and more and more.

And if we don’t go with it, life will at some point right itself anyway so thinking of it, you might as well do it the right way from the beginning and trust yourself.

The person you felt you shouldn’t date but you went on and dated anyway turns out to be a total jerk, which you knew from the beginning when your gut told you something is off, but you didn’t listen.

Hopefully you didn’t end up marrying him, but even if you did, life will at some point right itself and the marriage will be ended somehow (or maybe you’ll end up resenting each other for the rest of your lives) – perhaps with much tears and agony involved, which is totally unnecessary – you could have just gone with your gut right away.

Maybe your gut told you that ‘don’t take that job, it’s not for you’, but you did anyway because you wanted the money, and you might find yourself struggling and striving in the same old job ten years later, resenting every day you go there until your laid off, and that will be your ticket to liberation – when life finally decided to right itself – and then from that unemployment crisis something else can be birthed.

Something that could have been birthed ten years ago if you had had the guts to go with your instincts and turned down that job offer because you felt it wasn’t the right job for you.

It’s all about trusting yourself – but there is so much self-doubt in the world, so much.

People don’t trust themselves and they resent people who do have belief in themselves.

Unless they are hugely successful and influential in this world. In that case they might admire them, but still the self-doubt would be there; ‘that’s for them (for a lucky few), I can’t have that or do that’ they think.

Do you feel something within you that is calling you to some kind of action? Do you feel a change coming? Maybe it has been calling you for many years? Maybe there’s something that you know you should have let go of ages ago?

Get on with it! Follow that inclination. To not go with it is to ignore life.

And if it scares you – then you should really do it.

Begin at once to take some kind of action and do not wait until ‘tomorrow’; act on whatever comes to you and what you can think of at the moment; do it.

It doesn’t have to be anything grand, it can be a small step and then when you have taken that small step a new direction is shown and then you go in that direction by taking one step again and you follow that. And so it continues.

That way you get right into the flow of life, it unfolds before us, and It will carry you forward with inspiration, ideas and whatever message you need to hear in the precise right moment you need to hear it.

This happens all the time in my own life and the worst thing that anyone could do is to ignore what life wants to make happen through us

There are too many “I’ll do it tomorrow”‘s out there in the world and we all know what that means.

Tomorrow the moments gone. The magic of the moment is lost because it wasn’t followed through.

Do follow it – it takes us to beautiful places and brings more and more clarity and insights and the path forward reveals itself as we go with the flow of life.

Moving with life is an enjoyable experience (despite of trials and tests, you know they are a part of the process and your heightened awareness of them makes the ride so much more smooth) and almost always what’s stands in the way of that is some kind of fear.

Or doubt, like “how can I be sure that this is what life/god wants?”.

The answer is that we can’t know for absolute certain about anything so just get on with it, give it a sincere go and see what happens.

Screw fear and doubt. Screw people who are uncomfortable around you when you follow what’s right in your heart. Screw all that.

Do it anyway.

This day will not come again, ever. Dont waste it on other peoples expectations and wishes for you. They don’t know what you should do with anything.

Yes, there will be people who feel uncomfortable because you dance to your own drum or whatever the saying is, but who cares, really?

There will be weird looks when you go your own way and some might even resent you and get angry at you for doing what is right in your heart, but that should not be your problem – because there will always be people who don’t like what we do no matter what we do.

That’s a fact, so just get on with it.

Don’t even explain anything to them, just do your thing.

Reclaim your life and presence in this world.

This is your life – don’t waste it trying to please others.

 Isn’t this just beautiful? This is from the area where I live.

In the middle of the urbanisations you can suddenly see horses and goats etc roam freely. Amazing:)

PS: And the people who really do support you; acknowledge them – tell them that you appreciate them and that their support means a lot to you. Don’t wait on sharing the love or holding it back in any way. Again; this day is your whole life – live it to the fullest right now.

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